AAAARRRRGGGGHHHH!!!!

Oddjob tipped me to this story in comments with four mad faces. That’s a lot of mad faces. I had only to read the headline and subhead before I reached a four-alarm annoyance level:

Bush gives new reason for Iraq war

Says US must prevent oil fields from falling into hands of terrorists
I repeat: AAAARRRRGGGGHHHH!!!!

And it only gets worse from there (inserts mine).

President Bush answered growing antiwar protests yesterday with a fresh reason for US troops to continue fighting in Iraq: protection of the country's vast oil fields, which he said would otherwise fall under the control of terrorist extremists. [ARGH!]

The president, standing against a backdrop of the USS Ronald Reagan [ARGH!], the newest aircraft carrier in the Navy's fleet, said terrorists would be denied their goal of making Iraq a base from which to recruit followers, train them, and finance attacks.

[…]

Appearing at Naval Air Station North Island to commemorate the anniversary of the Allies' World War II victory over Japan, Bush compared his resolve to President Franklin D. Roosevelt's in the 1940s… [ARGH!]

Democrats said Bush's leadership falls far short of Roosevelt's. [No shit—ARGH!]

…Bush declared, ''We will not rest until victory is America's and our freedom is secure" from Al Qaeda and its forces in Iraq led by Abu Musab alZarqawi. [ARGH!]

''If Zarqawi and [Osama] bin Laden gain control of Iraq, they would create a new training ground for future terrorist attacks," Bush said. ''They'd seize oil fields to fund their ambitions. They could recruit more terrorists by claiming a historic victory over the United States and our coalition."

So, let me get this straight—the assertion was that Hussein was conspiring with al Qaida, so we had to invade, lest he give them weapons of mass destruction, but that proved to be utter bullshittery, so now, after swimming through a swamp of twaddle containing nine or so other rubbishy rationalizations for this insane-a-thon in Iraq, we’re there to prevent al Qaida from seizing the oil fields (to which Hussein would never have given them access, by the way—not that I’m defending his sorry ass) so they can, presumably, buy WMDs from some other despot who actually has them?

The head spins. And then it explodes.

KA-BOOM!

Ow.