Shakes Gets Bitchy

"It's devastating, it's got to be doubly devastating on the ground."

— President Bush, during his flyover of the areas ravaged by Katrina
After reading TBogg’s collection of winger responses to the president’s speech (thanks for the pointer, Spudsy), over the course of which you could see some of them talking themselves into how good it actually was after all, since none of the victims were watching it, anyhow, I’m totally fucking annoyed, because I’m sick of President Stupid’s every mistake being justified by everyone around him. He was a totally compassionless douche during that speech, which even his supporters are admitting, and I don’t think it’s for any other reason than because he’s basically a heartless bastard.

Check out Scottie McClellan’s efforts to make him seem like he gives a drip of shit about what’s going on:

MR. McCLELLAN: Okay, just to update you on the flyover. He was -- you'll have the still photos that will go out from the stills that were up there, you'll have pictures of him. But he was sitting up in the -- on the left side of the plane, the front part there, where the Secret Service detail usually sits, and looking out at all the hurricane damage along the Gulf coast region. He spent about 35 minutes there, in that seat.

Compassion Point #1: Bush spends thirty-five whole minutes with his precious ass in a seat that’s usually occupied by riffraff. And to show how extra compassionate he is, he doesn’t even require Karl Rove to give him his circle-circle-dot-dot cooties shot first.

MR. McCLELLAN: … It started with, as you all saw, with New Orleans. And we can see -- and the President was pointing out some of the different structures within the town, like the Superdome. … The President, when we were passing over that part of New Orleans, said, "It's devastating, it's got to be doubly devastating on the ground." And he pointed out some of the neighborhoods that I just mentioned, and pointed out -- there's a shopping mall, I think it was, we were trying to figure out what it was, and we thought it was a shopping mall that was under a lot of water.

Compassion Point #2: Bush acknowledges that people who may well be turning into radioactive prunes as they wait to be rescued from toxic, rancid, critter-infested water that consumed their entire lives in one big gulp are experiencing as least double the devastation that he is from the cushy comfort of Air Force One.

Compassion Point #3: Bush proves a liar anyone who suggests he hasn’t lifted a finger, by lifting a finger to point at stuff.

MR. McCLELLAN: … The President made a comment saying, it's totally wiped out, when he looked down at this one community, where you can see the homes that were just in pieces. … There was a bridge that had been wiped out. The President pointed out this one church that was still standing, but all the homes around it there were completely wiped out.

Compassion Point #4: Bush looks, comments, and points all at one community. That’s totally, like, triple super-duper compassionism.

Q Scott, can you say if the President requested this fly-over?

MR. McCLELLAN: The President certainly wanted to do it. I think that it had been discussed among the staff with the President, but the President certainly wanted to do it, as long as we weren't going to be disruptive of what was going on in the region.

Compassion Point #5: Bush doesn’t tell his staff to “get stuffed” when the suggestion is made that he maybe ought survey the damage from America’s worst national disaster and take a break from playing “Hail to the Chief” on his fancy new presidential guitar.

Pretty splendid, but even Scottie the Spinmeister couldn’t remotely make President Icyheart Blacksoul look like he actually game a damn about what was going on.

Someone had better give him a bullhorn and a costume hat, quick.