More News Conference Fun

Testy, testy:

QUESTION: Mr. President, though -- this is a direct follow-up to that -- the FISA law was implemented in 1978 in part because of revelations that the National Security Agency was spying domestically. What is wrong with that law that you feel you have to circumvent it and, as you just admitted, expand presidential powers?

BUSH: You said that I have to "circumvent" it. Wait a minute, that's a -- it's like saying, "You know, you're breaking the law." I'm not. See, that's what you got to understand: I am upholding my duty and at the same time doing so under the law and with the Constitution behind me. That's just very important for you to understand.

Secondly, the FISA law was written in 1978. We're having the discussion in 2006. It's a different world. And FISA's still an important tool. It's an important tool, and we still use that tool. But, also -- and I looked. I said, "Look, is it possible to conduct this program under the old law?" And people said, "It doesn't work in order to be able do the job we expect to us do."

And so, that's why I made the decision I made. And, you know, "circumventing" is a loaded word. And I refuse to accept it, because I believe what I'm doing is legally right.

Translation: I’m full of shit, but I’m telling you over and over that I’m not. I am not full of shit. That’s very important for you to believe and reprint far and wide until every American believes it, too.

Secondly, I’m a tool.

And, you know, I’m a lying tool, but I refuse to admit it, because I can do anything I fucking want MWAH HA HA HA.

(Yeah, and on the whole “legally right” thing—not so much.)