Drunk Driver Crashes Into Himself

Or “drink driver,” as they say in Britain:

A US drink driver, who drove at a gang of bikers while waving a pool cue, ran himself over after getting out of his car.

…California Highway Patrol Officer Scott Yox told the San Francisco Chronicle the man waved a pool cue at the bikers and swerved his car towards them. The bikers split into two groups to get away and the irate driver aimed his car at two bikers who had pulled off the highway. He got out of his car with the pool cue — but before he could do anything, he was knocked down by his own car which had been left in reverse.

…Some of the bikers grabbed him and pulled him out of danger. Authorities said they had no idea why Brooks reacted the way he did to the bikers, who kept calm and didn't retaliate. …The man suffered cuts and scratches and was taken to hospital. He could face charges of assault with a deadly weapon and drink driving.

What a douche.

Btw, the best line in the article is care of aforementioned CHiPs Officer Yox, re: the bikers: “We don't believe they went to fisticuffs with him.” Fisticuffs! How deliciously old-timey!


I do declare if my daddy hadn’t already given to my hand to Mr. Shakes, I’d fancy the notion of Mr. Yox being my gentleman caller.