Giuliani Makes His Move

No-Chance McGee is launching an exploratory committee:

Former New York City mayor Rudy Giuliani, a moderate Republican best known for his stewardship of the city after the Sept. 11 terrorist attacks, has taken the first step in a 2008 presidential bid, GOP officials said Monday.

The former mayor filed papers to create the Rudy Giuliani Presidential Exploratory Committee, Inc., establishing a panel that would allow him to raise money for a White House run and travel the country.

Really, Rudy—save your money. I’ll explore your chances for you right now for a buck and a pack of smokes:

Pro gun-control: No chance.

LGBT friendly: No chance.

Pro-choice: No chance.

I smoke Marlboro Lights. Thanks.

Once again, I will assert that the position No-Chance McGee is really running for is the bottom of the ticket. Some loopy wingnut will be the presidential nominee, and if, in the intervening year and a half, No-Chance can convince the GOP he can play in the south, he’ll get the veep slot. Of course, to play in the south, he’s got to give up the things that moderates like about him, so I don’t see where this can really go.

Also, I’ve always thought he sucked on TV. McCain’s no power personality, either, so the two of them together would be a nightmare of Nixonian proportions (ref. Kennedy debate). Then again, I still can’t believe there are people who think Bush is eloquent, so what the hell do I know?