Goody Gumdrops!

Gonzo consents to abide by the law. Aren't we all grateful for the magnanimity of our attorney general?

Attorney General Alberto Gonzales said Wednesday he will turn over secret documents detailing the government's domestic spying program, ending a two-week standoff with the Senate Judiciary Committee over surveillance targeting terror suspects.

So what was the big hold-up? Oh, I'll give you one fucking guess.

"We obviously would be concerned about the public disclosure that may jeopardize the national security of our country," he said. "But we're working with the Congress to provide the information that it needs."

I love the idea that Senate Judiciary Chairman Patrick Leahy and Senator Arlen Specter, who will receive the records, might just go haywire and start wantonly disseminating information that would put our national security at risk. It would be just like those two kooks.

Gonzales described the decision to release the documents to Leahy and Specter as the result of ongoing negotiations between Congress and the administration. He said lawmakers most likely will not have to review the documents at the Justice Department, which keeps a tight grip on classified information, but offered few other details.

"It's important for us that they understand what we're doing," Gonzales said. "All they have to do is ask."

It's so simple! Why didn't those wacky Senators ever think to just ask before?! They should have saved themselves the trouble of taking the issue to federal court and shit!

Why am I living in a cuckoo clock?