McCain and the Terrible, Horrible, No Good, Very Bad Day

First, McCain endears himself to people of color everywhere by using the phrase 'tar baby'.

A questioner [at McCain's mid-day town hall meeting in Cedar Falls, Iowa earlier today] asked McCain whether as president he "would be bold enough to address the issue of equal access to children for fathers that have gone through divorce."

The Republican presidential candidate responded, "I'm sorry to disappoint you, I am not going to overturn divorce court decisions. …[F]or me to stand here before all these people and say that I'm going declare divorces invalid because someone feels that they weren't treated fairly in court, we are getting into a, uh, uh, tar baby of enormous proportions. "

Later at a press conference, CNN's Senior Political Correspondent Candy Crowley asked McCain about his use of the phrase "tar baby," viewed by some as having racist overtones.

"I hope that it's not viewed that way," McCain said. "It was a situation where if I kept going on that I would then be overturning court decisions. I don't think I should have used that word and it was wrong to do so."

Hey, asshole—ask Tony Snow and Mitt Romney if they think it will be viewed that way.

Then he got tripped up by his own wandering position on abortion.

[S]omeone asked about public funding for contraception in Africa to prevent the spread of AIDS. "I'm sure I've taken a position on it in the past," he stammered as he looked to his communications director. "I'm sure I'm opposed to government funding."

Sensing a vulnerable moment, reporters kept the questions coming. What about sex education in the schools? Should it mention contraceptives? Or only abstinence, like President Bush wants? "I think I support the president's present policy," he said, tentatively.

More questions: Do condoms stop sexually transmitted disease? A long pause. A stern look. "I've never gotten into these issues or thought much about them," he said, almost crying uncle. "Obviously, we all want to stop the spread of AIDS. Everybody wants to do that. What's the most viable way of doing that?"

…In a last ditch attempt to rescue himself, McCain told an aide to go get a briefing paper prepared by Oklahoma Sen. Tom Coburn, a doctor, who he said has been advising him on "these issues." But the aide couldn't find the briefing paper. "We've lost it," McCain mumbled.

"Whether I support government funding for them or not, I don't know," McCain said about contraceptives. He then said he'd look into it for the reporters, who finally let him off the hook and moved onto other subjects again.

Jebus, what a disaster this guy is. Here's a clue, McCain—why don't you do what you actually believe and then it won't be so hard to keep track of what your fucking policy positions are. Integrity makes your organizational efforts a hell of a lot easier than "Me Too"-ing everything, which naturally requires trying to keep track of who Jerry Falwell and Friends are hating this week.

Jackass.