White Flour!

Hello, all. SAP here ...

OK, settle down, stop screaming, and get away from that ledge. This is only a guest post. Sheesh.

For the uninitiated, I am a frequent commenter (and frequent troll-hater, though I'm trying to cut back to one troll a month) here at Shakesville, and Melissa has graciously allowed me to cross-post this little gem here at my second home. (Note to Liss: the check is in the mail.)

Occasionally, just to scare the ever-living daylights out of me, Paul and Melissa will blog about clowns, knowing full well that I hate clowns; ever since I was a young lad, I have held a deep-abiding hatred for two nominally-cherished icons of childhood: puppets (thanks a lot, Rod Serling) and clowns.

While I may never rescind my fear and loathing of puppets, I believe I have overcome my disgust of all things clown, thanks to the 100th Anti-Racist Action Clown Block. Because, really, who better to counter a KKK recruitment rally than 100 clowns?


The KKK meet their match.

Saturday May 26th the VNN Vanguard Nazi/KKK group attempted to host a hate rally to try to take advantage of the brutal murder of a white couple for media and recruitment purposes. http://www.volunteertv.com/special

Unfortunately for them the 100th ARA (Anti Racist Action) clown block came and handed them their asses by making them appear like the asses they were.

Alex Linder the founder of VNN and the lead organizer of the rally kicked off events by rushing the clowns in a fit of rage, and was promptly arrested by 4 Knoxville police officers who dropped him to the ground when he resisted and dragged him off past the red shiny shoes of the clowns. http://www.volunteertv.com/home/headlines/7704982.html

“White Power!” the Nazi’s shouted, “White Flour?” the clowns yelled back running in circles throwing flour in the air and raising separate letters which spelt “White Flour”.

“White Power!” the Nazi’s angrily shouted once more, “White flowers?” the clowns cheers and threw white flowers in the air and danced about merrily.

“White Power!” the Nazi’s tried once again in a doomed and somewhat funny attempt to clarify their message, “ohhhhhh!” the clowns yelled “Tight Shower!” and held a solar shower in the air and all tried to crowd under to get clean as per the Klan’s directions.

At this point several of the Nazi’s and Klan members began clutching their hearts as if they were about to have a heart attack. Their beady eyes bulged, and the veins in their tiny narrow foreheads beat in rage. One last time they screamed “White Power!”

The clown women thought they finally understood what the Klan was trying to say. “Ohhhhh…” the women clowns said. “Now we understand…”, “WIFE POWER!” they lifted the letters up in the air, grabbed the nearest male clowns and lifted them in their arms and ran about merrily chanting “WIFE POWER! WIFE POWER! WIFE POWER!”

It was at this point that several observers reported seeing several Klan members heads exploding in rage and they stopped trying to explain to the clowns what they wanted.

Apparently the clowns fundamentally misunderstood the nature of the rally, they believed it was a clown rally and came in force to support their pointy hated brethren. To their dismay, despite their best jokes and stunts and pratfalls the Nazis and Klan refused to laugh, and indeed became enraged at the clowns misunderstanding and constant attempts to interpret the clowns instruction.

The clowns on the other hand had a great time and thought the Nazis were the funniest thing they had ever seen and the loud laughter of over 100 counter protesters greeted every attempt of the Nazis and Klan to get their message out, whatever that was.

Out. Standing. Anyone who would dress up like a clown and counter-rally the Klan is OK with me.

So, no more dissing clowns for me. Let all children rejoice in the hallowed traditions of face paint and whoopie cushions! Let all rejoice in the freedom-loving ways of our freaky big shoe'd brothers and sisters!

Unless they're Nazi clowns. Then all bets are off.

Via Metafilter.