Media Suckitude, Part 1,547,923

1. Jianguo Liu, a researcher who holds the Rachel Carson chair in ecological sustainability at Michigan State University, leads a study into divorce and ecological footprints.

2. The study concludes that households "in which a divorce occurs have a greater negative impact on the environment in terms of efficient use of resources than the households of married couples," i.e. two people in two homes use more energy than two people in one home. Duh.

3. Liu says he hopes couples "will think about the decision. Also, they can inform other people about the environmental impact of divorce." This could be construed as a covert recommendation against divorce, or it could be interpreted as a simple recommendation to treat your ecological footprint as something else to consider during a divorce.

4. Story is written with no clarification of Liu's statements.

5. Story is nonetheless headlined: "Want to Go 'Green'? Stay Married" and subtitled: "Divorced Households Have Negative Impact on Environment, Study Finds."

6. Story also includes no suggestion that an alternative to staying married and martyring oneself for the environment is getting divorced and living in smaller quarters appropriate for single people.

7. Story makes no comment whatsoever about the fact that many Americans already live in resource-guzzling homes—and that two partnered people living in a 5,000-square-foot house by themselves just because they can is more ecologically unfriendly than two separated people living in two small, energy-efficient apartments. Story also makes no comment about whether study controls for wanton consumerism.

8. Story is thusly pointless dreck. Possibly study is pointless dreck.

9. Countless people will read this story and think: "Divorcees are ruining the environment." Some of these people will live by themselves in homes built to accommodate entire families.