Stealth Homos!!

I want you all to see the completely evil, corrupting to teh chyldrenz, sex-infused stealth homo commercial the Evil Homosexual Agenda(tm) is currently using to indoctrinate children into their evil ways. And their evil sandwich-making.


It's just sinister, right? Well, of course, as you've probably figured out, people went apeshit and Heinz pulled the ad:

Heinz has withdrawn its Deli Mayo TV ad that featured two men sharing a kiss and apologised to viewers after the advertising regulator received about 200 complaints that it was offensive and inappropriate.

The Heinz Deli Mayo ad has been pulled after less than a week on air after viewers complained to the Advertising Standards Authority that it was "offensive" and "inappropriate to see two men kissing".

Of course, the humor of the whole ad completely flew over their heads, but I suppose I'm stupid for assuming homophobes might have a sense of humor*. And for the record, I find it completely fucking offensive that you think a kiss between two men is "inappropriate to see." Mmmkay?

Other complaints include that the ad was "unsuitable to be seen by children" and that it raised the difficult problem of parents having to discuss the issue of same-sex relationships with younger viewers.

Yes, it's our good friend "won't someone please think of the children." Welcome to the one-trick pony circus. And Jebus forbid that you have to explain a concept to your child that might be difficult. Horror of horrors! You mean parenting involves work? Frankly folks, the only people that might have difficulty explaining the concept of a same-sex relationship are people that hate same-sex relationships. It's so hard to convey bigotry and hatred to a five-year-old, you know? While still pretending to be a good parent, I mean. Whatever will I do?

"It is our policy to listen to consumers. We recognise that some consumers raised concerns over the content of the ad and this prompted our decision to withdraw it," said Nigel Dickie, director of corporate affairs for Heinz UK.

Yeah, all two hundred of them. Of course, the thousands that didn't complain or even enjoyed the ad are not important. Not that this matters anyway, because:

The Heinz TV ad carried an "ex-kids" restriction, meaning it cannot be shown in or around children's programming, because Heinz Deli Mayo falls foul of Ofcom's TV ad restrictions relating to products that are high in fat, salt and sugar.

So these hysterical homophobes had nothing to worry about, the "what about the children" bullshit was so much smoke and mirrors, but the ad got pulled anyway. For a quick peck that hardly qualifies as passionate or even sexy.

As Deeky said in an email to Liss and I over this story: "Corporations just need to say "fuck you, if you don't like our ad, don't buy our fuckin' mustard!"

Fucking right.

(Transcript of the ad, from the article:)

Heinz's ad opens with a family on a normal morning routine with a young boy and girl getting ready for school and their father preparing for the office.

The young boy and girl go to the kitchen to get their sandwiches, which are being prepared by a man with a New York accent, dressed in a deli serving outfit, who they refer to as "mum".

When their father goes to get his sandwich he says to mum in the kitchen: "See you tonight love."

However, mum barks back "Hey, ain't you forgetting something?", at which point the two men share a kiss. Mum then sends the father off with the words: "Love you. Straight home from work, sweet cheeks."

(*For the record, I've seen that some supportive folks aren't 100% pleased with the ad either, due to the "mother" being identified as such. I.E., one of the men in a gay male relationship has to be "the woman." I can see their point, but I don't think this ad is actually trying to show a "gay relationship." My opinion, YMMV.)