Vloggin' with Blogginz, Episode 2

[Episode One.]

[Also available at Daily Motion. Full transcript below.]

Title Card: Vloggin' with Blogginz

KBlogz: Hey, everybody at Shakesville! This is me, Kenny Blogginz, and I'm here with another one of my fabled book reviews. [Liss snickers.] Do you wanna see a book that's got a really great cover on it?

Liss: Yeah!

KBlogz: [picks up book] It's the Red Wizard! [edit; close-up of book cover] Just, just look at his face. [points to the face of Ryan the Red Wizard, which looks vaguely pissy] Just look at the expression that the artist managed to capture in that—this is, this is Ryan.

Liss: And there's a rainbow behind him!

KBlogz: There's a rainbow behind him. [traces rainbow with fingers]

Liss: He's got a cape…

KBlogz: [points at cape] He's wearing a red cape. Um, he's holding a crayon!

Liss: And he's got a jaunty pose, I have to say.

KBlogz: He's got a very jaunty pose. Um, he looks like a very, um, he looks, he looks like a clever boy! [Liss laughs] He looks like an adventurous young boy.

Liss: He does indeed.

[edit]

KBlogz: This is the only copy I've ever seen.

Liss: Where did you get it?

KBlogz: The Salvation Army.

Liss: Uh-huh. Is that a library book?

KBlogz: It is a library book [opens cover to reveal library card] from…an elementary school, I guess. Now it's here with me.

Liss: Lucky!

KBlogz: And the Red Wizard, uh, [opens cover to read] is about a tiny boy named Ryan DeWitt, and he thinks his parents don't like him. And why else would they drag him on a boring family vacation, where there's nothin' to do but listen to the gulls? And Ryan's father can never seem to understand Ryan thirst for excitement, ya dummies! [sighs exasperatedly; puts hand on hip] He has his mind set for Ryan to inherit and expand on the family business. Sounds boring!

Liss: It sure does. 'Cuz I bet the family business isn't, like, wizardry or anything.

KBlogz: No! This is, this vacation is meant to relieve his father's work-related stress, but, uh, Ryan just keeps day-dreaming, and his dad gets really mad at him, and then—wouldn't you know it? That's right when he gets transported to a mystical landscape!

Liss: [laughs] Holding a red crayon. A red Crayola crayon, I notice.

KBlogz: Well, I started reading it, and, basically, the plot is that having a red crayon, like—y'know, pigments were a lot harder to come by in the past, and also in, like, Narnia or whatever.

Liss: Mm.

KBlogz: So that's slightly more valuable there.

Liss: The red crayon?

KBlogz: Yeah.

Liss: It's like a currency in a different dimension.

KBlogz: Sort of. And there's like a magic wizard who sort of, you know, gives him sandwiches and stuff.

[Liss laughs; edit]

KBlogz: [reading] Soon, though, Ryan has to confront deadly danger from a young warlock named Rudd.

Liss: Paul Rudd?

KBlogz: No, it's just Rudd.

Liss: Mm.

KBlogz: Ryan—And, in order to defeat him, Ryan must learn to face his own fear of the warlock's powers!

Liss: Are you sure it's not Paul Rudd? And the warlock is Judd Apatow?

KBlogz: Paul Rudd is Judd Apataow!

Liss: [gasps] What?!

KBlogz: [laughs] I mean, the warlock is Rudd! Judd Apatow is a very powerful necromancer. [Liss laughs] With this new knowledge of himself, and through the deep magic behind colors, Ryan is ready to face returning home. It looks like returning home might just be the hardest part of the whole mystical journey.

[edit]

KBlogz: [holding book next to face and singing, Creed-like] Red Wizard! Red Wizard! Red Wizard! Red Wizard!

[edit]

Liss: Did you wear your red cape in honor of the Red Wizard?

KBlogz: [who is wearing a red hoodie tied around his neck like a cape] Yeah! I did.

Liss: And what about your trucker hat?

KBlogz: Trucker hat has an M on it—and that stands for magic.

[edit]

KBlogz: I love Red Wizaaaaaaaaard!!!

Title Card: The End!!!