This is a real thing in the world.

Voiceover: The action's real, in an all-new real-life series. Steven Seagal: Lawman.

[bunch of urgent yelling, like "Get him! Get him!" and "Calm down!" over montage of random police shit]

Voiceover: It all began twenty years ago, when Seagal, a world-renowned seventh-degree aikido expert, was shooting a movie in Jefferson Parish. The sheriff asked him to teach his men some self-defense and weapons skills. The training was so successful, Segal was deputized. And for twenty years, between films, he's been serving as a full-fledged member of the force.

Seagal: Well, the show is real. I mean, it's—this is not a joke.

[bunch of urgent yelling, like "Get out! Get out!" and "That's what I'm talkin' about!" over montage of random police shit]

Seagal: This is real police officers down here in life-and-death situations. Worst-case scenario: Many of them are forced to actually defend themselves. Every day.

Voiceover: No scripts. No stunt doubles. No second chances. Steven Seagal: Lawman.

Some Random Voice: It's not a job—it's an adventure!

The best part is certainly "Well, the show is real. This is not a joke." Okay, I'm sold! But the next best part is the voiceover about it being unscripted over footage that looks totally scripted, lol. December can't come soon enough.

I bet the commercial breaks are just going to be two-minute block adverts for Steven Seagal's Lightning Bolt.