Assvertising

Shakers JJ, Debra, Natbsat, Garbo, Shauna, and MLM have all emailed me about the new Reebok commercial for their EasyTone shoes:

[close-up of woman's breasts in bra]

Right Breast: Hey, did you see? Uh, nobody's staring at us anymore.

Left Breast: Are we still hot?!

Right Breast: Kuh-learly! You know what? It's all because of that stupid butt down there.

Left Breast: Yeah! Stupid butt! Gets all the attention now!

Right Breast: She's so tight now, so round, so pretty.

Left Breast: And so...stupid!

[close-up of woman's butt in underpants]

Male voiceover: Make your boobs jealous with the shoe proven to tone your butt up to 28% more, and your hamstrings and calves up to 11% more, than regular sneakers. Reebok EasyTone, with balance-ball inspired technology. Better legs and a better butt with every step.

It's like Disembodied Things meets the worst of Assvertising. Lordy begordy.

Shaker Garbo emailed Reebok to complain and got the following response, which she describes quite rightly as "the classic 'sorry if you were offended but normal people weren't' non-apology" (emphasis mine):

Thank you very much for your feedback. All consumer feedback is helpful, as it provides us with an understanding of the public perception and opinion of our products and marketing.

The Reebok EasyTone ads were created to clearly illustrate the unique benefits of the footwear in a fun and bold way. The feedback we have received tells us that many consumers look at the ads in exactly that light, however we acknowledge that some consumers do take exception with the content of the ads.

You can be assured that your feedback will be relayed directly to our marketing team.

Regards,
Reebok Corporate Communications

Says Garbo re: many consumers look at the ads in exactly that light, "i.e. correctly, as opposed to you, humorless feminist." That feminists would object is figured into their marketing strategy. What they're hoping is that it will be posted in feminist forums, but enough feminist readers will still hate their bodies more than they hate the ad, hate their bodies enough to be interested in the product nonetheless. Just another reason feminism and fat/body acceptance are inextricably linked.

[Assvertising: Parts One, Two, Three, Four, Five, Six, Seven, Eight, Nine, Ten, Eleven, Twelve, Thirteen, Fourteen, Fifteen, Sixteen, Seventeen, Eighteen, Nineteen, Twenty, Twenty-One, Twenty-Two, Twenty-Three, Twenty-Four, Twenty-Five, Twenty-Six, Twenty-Seven, Twenty-Eight, Twenty-Nine, Thirty, Thirty-One, Thirty-Two, Thirty-Three, Thirty-Four, Thirty-Five, Thirty-Six, Thirty-Seven, Thirty-Eight, Thirty-Nine, Forty, Forty-One, Forty-Two, Forty-Three, Forty-Four, Forty-Five, Forty-Six, Forty-Seven, Forty-Eight, Forty-Nine, Fifty, Fifty-One, Fifty-Two, Fifty-Three, Fifty-Four, Fifty-Five, Fifty-Six, Fifty-Seven, Fifty-Eight, Fifty-Nine, Sixty, Sixty-One, Sixty-Two, Sixty-Three, Sixty-Four, Sixty-Five, Sixty-Six, Sixty-Seven, Sixty-Eight, Sixty-Nine, Seventy, Seventy-One, Seventy-Two, Seventy-Three, Seventy-Four, Seventy-Five, Seventy-Six, Seventy-Seven, Seventy-Eight, Seventy-Nine, Eighty, Eighty-One, Eighty-Two, Eighty-Three, Eighty-Four.]