How Dare You! Check Out My Pecs.

[Trigger warning.]

Joe Francis is mad.

To be precise, the "Girls Gone Wild" impresario is mad at Gawker, who recently named him their Douche of the Decade. No, he's not mad for being named a superdouche; he's mad because, in the associated profile, he's identified as a rapist, based on a widely-discussed 2006 report in the LA Times that alleges he is one.

And so Francis did what any reasonable person would do in such a circumstance. He fired off a totally absurd email to Gawker founder and managing editor Nick Denton.

Hey Nick,
I am suing you tomorrow personally. You messed with the wrong guy. No one makes up lies about me and gets away with it. I lost a 10 million dollar deal as a direct result of you calling me "a rapist". You will be paying me every dime of that back and more! Are you mentally retarded? Do your research first. I am coming after you harder than I ever went after anyone. I am going to wipe you off the grid!!!! YOU ARE DONE! I will take everything you have. You, Nick Denton, are truly the "Douche of the Decade Merry Xmas IDIOT!!! Joe Francis P.S. I sent you an updated picture of how I actually look now so you can masturbate to it because you seem to be quite sexually obsessed with me.

[The message is followed by an email signature with disclaimer info, and an attached photo of Francis naked from the waist up.]

Oh dear.

And thus did the campaign for Megadouche of the Millennium begin.