Oh. I See This Book Wasn't Written for Me.

So I'm reading Malcolm Gladwell's book Outliers (with which I have some problems, that I may write about later), and I come to this passage:

Hard work is a prison sentence only if it does not have meaning. Once it does, it becomes the kind of thing that makes you grab your wife around the waist and dance a jig. (p 150)

Now, Gladwell strikes me as a reasonably smart fella. I believe it's safe to say he knows his readership isn't exclusively limited to straight married men—and married or civil-unionized lesbian or bisexual ladies in several European countries, Canada, Massachusetts, Connecticut, Vermont, Iowa, and/or California, who were grandparented into legal marriage before Prop 8 reared its disgustingly ugly head and revoked the right.*

But I can understand why he wrote an exclusionary, sexist sentence that totally took me out of the experience of reading by reminding me of my marginalization. It's so hard to write for everyone.

"Once it does, it becomes the kind of thing that makes you grab a loved one around the waist and dance a jig."

That took me at least six seconds of arduous thought. And I managed to make it inclusive of everyone on the planet who has a loved one, loved in any way. Oops—except for physically disabled people who can't dance jigs.

"Once it does, it becomes the kind of thing that makes you grab a loved one and celebrate."

That took me at least three more seconds of brain-straining contemplation. Now it includes everyone on the planet who has a loved one, loved in any way. Oops—except for people who are separated from their loved one(s) for some reason, like, say, being deployed to Iraq for a third tour.

"Once it does, it becomes the kind of thing worth celebrating."

There. I think I've got it.

It did, however, take a full twelve seconds of consideration. What person could reasonably be expected to make that kind of effort?

Quite obviously, I should just learn to read right past every single passing reference to my marginalization to which I am subjected every single day of my life. That's much more fair than expecting someone to take less time than it takes to piss to make sure their prose doesn't exclude more than half the world's population.

Oh, did that sound contemptuous...?

Good.

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* Seriously, People of Earth: Please universally legalize same-sex marriage so I can stop writing awkward sentences like that. Yeah, that's right—since appeals to reason haven't seemed to work, I'm now appealing to what I believe is an innate human need to read well-written blog posts.