[Transcript below.]
Text Onscreen: A long time ago in a galaxy far, far away…
Voiceover (done by a little kid speaking very quickly over a stop-motion montage of images of Lego figurines and landscapes reflecting what's being said): Once upon a time there was a boy who lived in the desert. The desert was very boring, but he longed to have a big adventure one day. Then he met a couple of robots and decided to go save the galaxy—and a pretty girl. So they all went to look for the crazy old man that lives in the desert. He told the boy his dad was a Jedi Knight, and he gave him a magic sword. Then it was time to go to space, but first they needed a ship—and a captain. That guy seemed good. Plus, he had a big, hairy sidekick. So they all went to Alderaan, but it exploded. So they went to the Death Star instead. They got chased by some guys, saved the pretty girl, lost the crazy old man, and got away. Then they came back and blew it up. And they all lived happily ever after. Until the bad guys found the secret base and messed everything up. The captain and the pretty girl and the hairy sidekick hid in some space routes, while the boy went to learn to be a real Jedi Knight, just like his dad. But a big monster ate the ship, and the boy wasn't very good at it, so they went to Cloud City, where the captain ran into his best friend in the whole entire galaxy—sorry, second best—who betrayed them! Then the boy arrived to save the day. But he was a little bit late. And a whole lot in trouble. Maybe he should have practiced. That was when the boy got some very surprising news about his dad. He didn't take it very well. This time, they didn't live so happily ever after—especially the captain. So his friends went to rescue him. It didn't go so well. So they tried a different plan. That one didn't go so well, either. Fortunately, it all worked out in the end. Unfortunately, the bad guys were building a new Death Star. So the boy and his friends went on a secret mission to go blow it up. Again. Until they caught by man-eating teddy bears. Who became their new friends. The boy spent the day with his dad, and got to meet his dad's boss. Meanwhile, in space, it was a trap! But their new friends fixed things. And the boy's dad saved the day! And the Death Star exploded again! And they all lived happily ever after. Except for that guy. The end.
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