I Write Letters

Dear CNN.com:

It's really swell of you to offer a Gay in America section for Pride Month and all, but I was already uncomfortable with how much "Gays—They're Just Like Normal Straight People!" content was comprising the section (although I shouldn't be surprised you don't know how to write about gay families that don't have/want kids, since you don't even really know how to write about straight families that don't have/want kids), and that was before I saw the "Conversation" topic "Gay Couples as Parents?"

First of all, let's talk about the question mark. There are like gerjillions of same-sex couples openly (and frequently uncontroversially) parenting kids in the US already, and have been for decades, with various degrees of legal and cultural support in different locations. And there are gerjillions of adults who have parents who came out later in life, after producing children within an opposite-sex marriage. And there are multiple studies showing that same-sex parents make as good (or better) parents on average as opposite-sex parents, which only exist because researchers have had access to loads of kids with gay parents.

So, gay couples are parents. Period. No question mark required.

But, of course, the reason it's there is because this is a conversation, and you're inviting people to share their opinions on gay parenting. Which is a dubious way of honoring Pride Month in any case, no less when the solicitation of opinions is written in a way that explicitly excludes gay parents (emphasis mine):

How do you feel about gay couples having a family? Should they be allowed to adopt and be foster parents? What if you had a gay member of your family and they decided to have a baby through adoption, surrogacy or sperm donor? How would you react to it? Share your comments below.

These are not questions designed to invite gay parents to share their opinions on gay parenting. These are questions designed to invite straight people to pontificate about a subject that should be none of their fucking business, but is because of the undeserved privilege that is continually reinforced by shit like asking straight people to weigh in on gay parenting in a way that deliberately excludes lesbians and gay men and bisexuals from the conversation.

If the objective was to challenge the marginalization of LGBs, I'm afraid we have a raging case of the megafails here, CNN. If, however, the objective was to engage in the same tired old habit of pandering to the delicate sensibilities of the intractably bigoted, then grab your codpieces and go stand in front of a Mission Accomplished banner on an aircraft carrier, bitchez, 'cuz that shit is solid.

Please do better.

Love,
Liss