Oh Goody

Gingrich planning May presidential announcement. I hope he does it on my birthday! There's nothing I like better for my birthday than GARBAGE!

Speaking of how Newt Gingrich is a terrible person (whut?), here he is explaining why he is a thrice-married serial cheater:

"There's no question at times of my life, partially driven by how passionately I felt about this country, that I worked far too hard and things happened in my life that were not appropriate," said Gingrich. "And what I can tell you is that when I did things that were wrong, I wasn't trapped in situation ethics, I was doing things that were wrong, and yet, I was doing them."

Let he among us whose penis hasn't been been driven to tumescent wandering by patriotism cast the first stone! I can't even LOOK at a star or a stripe without my nipples getting hard.

"I found that I felt compelled to seek God's forgiveness. Not God's understanding, but God's forgiveness. I do believe in a forgiving God. And I think most people, deep down in their hearts hope there's a forgiving God. Somebody once said that when we're young, we seek justice, but as we get older, we seek mercy. There's something to that, I think.

"I feel that I'm now 67 I'm a grandfather. I have two wonderful grandchildren. I have two wonderful daughters and two great sons in law. Callista and I have a great marriage. I think that I've learned an immense amount. And I do feel, in that sense, that God has given me, has blessed me with an opportunity as a person."

So vote for Newt. Unless you think you're better than GOD or something.