This is so the worst thing you're going to read today

[Trigger warning for misogyny and enforcement of the gender binary]

It turns out there's a new book about how "men are from Mars and women are from Venus." Because God's a funny lady, it turns out that "we all live on planet Earth." Zany!

It also turns out that CNN.com has a trenchant interview with Anne Kramer, the book's author.

In this interview, we learn that men can be abusive, violent assholes. It's science! More specifically, it's the science of hormones! Also, it is the science of half-assed culturally-laden assumptions!

By the way, if you're not sure what this male-colleague being a thundering asscannon looks like, CNN.com has uploaded a photograph. Paperwork, amirite?

What's the book about, you ask, not particularly looking forward to the answer?

[Kramer, the] former worldwide creative director of Nickelodeon and Nick at Nite interviewed more than 200 working Americans to get a sense of what's going on in their heads and how that spectrum of emotion manifests itself in the office.

She places their personal stories within the context of scientific research and statistical analysis to explain why we occasionally cry, yell or break down in the workplace and how to manage those emotions.

I'm not going to get into the science (and statistics!) of why I occasionally (constantly) cry or break down in the workplace. I'm also not going to talk about which pharmaceuticals I use as a result of this phenomenon. (Kramer helpfully suggests that I cook more, although I'm not sure how my boss feels about red wine stains on the carpet. Correction: I am sure about this.)

Besides, the experiences of me, an actual person, aren't all that important. Among other things, I'm an n of 1. I am, as they say in the science mines, statistically powerless. Also:

Women's tear ducts are anatomically different from men's.

So there's that. As a trans woman who's been taking massive amounts of lady hormones for many years, I can only assume that my tear ducts shoot out tears of rage. Presumably, these rage-tears smell like the unholy alliance of bacon and lilacs. You know, science, jazzhands, etcetera.

Speaking of helpful advice:

If you can decode what's at the root of your feelings, you can develop an action plan to deal with the issues.

This is great advice, because all people have the same actions available to them, regardless of gender or anything else. Duh.

In closing, Kramer's book is all about empathy. As she says:

If I'd known, for instance, that men produce cortisol and testosterone (the fight or flight aggression hormones) when under stress I might have taken some of the more tense interactions less personally.

Indeed. If there's one thing that science has taught me, it's that ladies need to lighten up.