Texting! With Liss and Deeky!

Posted by Deeky at Wednesday, October 12, 2011
Deeky: The worst picture of me ever taken…

image of young Deeks standing and waving at the camera with slightly raised eyebrow

Liss: LOLOLOLOLOL!!! You mean the BEST picture of you ever taken!

Deeky: I look like such a tool!

Liss: The raised eyebrow is just hilarious. I just want to spend the entire day adding dialogue bubbles to that picture and sending them to you.

Deeky: LOLOLOLOL!!!

[Approximately five minutes later…]

Liss:

image photoshopped to contain dialogue bubble reading 'Guess how many times I had sex with your boyfriend last night?' just above Deeky's raised hand, making it look like the answer is 'five'.

Deeky: LOLOLOL!!! That's terrible. And awesome.

Liss:

image photoshopped to contain dialogue bubble reading 'Guess how many stars I gave 'Less Than Zero' on Netflix?' just above Deeky's raised hand, making it look like the answer is 'five'.

Deeky: Ha! Less Than Zero! Nice eighties reference.

Liss:

image photoshopped to contain dialogue bubble reading 'Guess how many times I've tried out for 'Rock & Roll Jeopardy'?' just above Deeky's raised hand, making it look like the answer is 'five'.

Deeky: You're such a doofus.

Liss:

image photoshopped to contain dialogue bubble reading 'Guess how many credits I am away from my degree in buttholology?' just above Deeky's raised hand, making it look like the answer is 'five'.

Deeky: Shut up! I HATE YOU! Butthole. LOLOLOL!!!

Liss:

image photoshopped to contain dialogue bubble reading 'Guess how many times I've listened to the new Blur album so far today?' just above Deeky's raised hand, making it look like the answer is 'five'.

Deeky: LOL! Though, I am pretty sure Blur weren't even around then. Not even as Seymour.

Liss: I thought the anachronism would be amusing. SORRY PEDANT-HEAD!!! LOLOLOLOLOLOLOL. P.S.

image photoshopped to contain dialogue bubble reading 'I totally just scored front-row seats to Blue Oyster Cult. High five!' just above Deeky's raised hand, making it look like the answer is 'five'.

Deeky: BLUE OYSTER CULT! LOLOLOL!!! I really DO hate you now.

Liss:

image photoshopped to contain dialogue bubble reading 'Guess how many bumps of blow I need to do to get through this job every day?' just above Deeky's raised hand, making it look like the answer is 'five'.

Deeky: LOLOLOLOL!!! You're terrible!

Liss:

image photoshopped to contain dialogue bubble reading 'I am from Planet Dildo. I come in peace.' just above Deeky's raised hand, making it look like he's raising his hand in greeting.

Deeky: YOU are from Planet Dildo!

Liss: No fucking doy I am! P.S.

image photoshopped to contain dialogue bubble reading 'Guess how many hours I spent watching re-runs of M*A*S*H last night?' just above Deeky's raised hand, making it look like the answer is 'five'.

Deeky: You're killing me!

Liss:

image photoshopped to contain dialogue bubble with musical notes reading 'Stop! In the name of buttz!' just above Deeky's raised hand, making it look like he's raising his hand in a 'stop' gesture.

Deeky: LOLOL!

Liss:

image photoshopped to contain dialogue bubble reading 'I swear to suck your butt, your whole butt, and nothing but your butt.' just above Deeky's raised hand, making it look like he's raising his hand to take an oath.

Deeky: Obviously.

Liss:

image photoshopped to contain dialogue bubble reading 'Guess how many cabbages I have in my pants?' just above Deeky's raised hand, making it look like the answer is 'five'.

Deeky: Cabbages? WTF? LOL!

Liss:

image photoshopped to contain dialogue bubble reading 'I'm this many years old!' just above Deeky's raised hand, making it look like he is 'five'.

Deeky: LOL! You are! You can tell because your jokes are so childish!

Liss:

image photoshopped to contain dialogue bubble reading 'Hi. My name is Deeky, and I'm a professional homosexual.' just above Deeky's raised hand, making it look like he's raising his hand in greeting.

Deeky: LOL!

Liss:

image photoshopped to contain dialogue bubble reading 'STOP! HAMMERTIME!' just above Deeky's raised hand, making it look like he's raising his hand in a 'stop' gesture.
The End.

Deeky: LOLOLOLOLOLOLOL! Hammertime! Awesome. Totally awesome.

Liss: *drops microphone; walks offstage*

[And thus was the selection for today's Two-Minute Nostalgia Sublime inevitable…]
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