Finding Jack

I was driving home the other day, ambling through rush hour traffic, thinking about how much I need to pee. Typical Friday, really. Edmondson Avenue heading into downtown was crowded, slow, but not completely stopped.

Somewhere between Uplands Park and Cathedral Cemetery I saw a cumpled up brown paper sack in the road in front of me. The only reason I really noticed the litter was because of it's shape. I thought to myself, "That piece of paper looks just like a kitten."

A moment later I realized that piece of paper was a kitten! Eep!

Okay, so just to get an idea of where this furball was, I've kindly recreated the placement of the kitten in the image below. I've also used a graphic of a teddy bear in place of the feline for reasons that should be obvious.



(Artist's rendering © 2011 Deekyvision Enterprises GmbH.)
I stopped, put on my flashers and jumped from the car. I ran to the front of the car but the kitten was gone. Crap. He'd crawled under my car. I guess for safety? "Kitty, don't do that!"

Reaching for him just prompted him to run out behind my car. Uh oh. Yeah, if "Yakety Sax" had been playing, it would have been perfect. I chased him around a bit, holding up traffic as we weaved and dodged around the road around my car until he slowed enough for me to grab him.

As I carried him back to the car I noticed how scrawny he was. A tiny little underfed thing. I tossed him onto the floorboard and drove away, not sure what I was going to do with a dirty, mewing kitten. A bit down the road I stopped and, using my smart phone, checked the hours for the city's animal shelter. Unfortunately they'd closed for the evening.

Well, I said to myself, I guess he can stay the night and I'll drop him off in the morning.

That was over a week ago. The kitten is still in my apartment.


I took him to the vet the next morning. They bathed him, weighed him (1.6lbs), and following some tests declared him in good health. His name is Jack.

Here he is that first night, having perched himself on my back, like I'm a pirate and he's a parrot:


For scale, here is Jack and an Xbox controller:


Welcome home, Jack. I am glad to have found you. You're safe now.

Oh, and to the woman who gave me dirty looks as I was picking up Jack from the road: Kiss my ass.

[Cross-posted.]