Top Chef Texas: Open Thread

image of former Top Chef contestant Mike Isabella saying: 'Well, the one good thing you can definitely say about Top Chef Season 9 is that I ain't on it!'

Did you enjoy last night's elimination? I know I did! Goodbye to the Person Who Got Eliminated! I will not miss you. You were a bully and a jerk.

Other things I enjoyed: Healthy Choice sponsoring the bacon challenge. Patti LaBelle! Watching approximately 3/4 of the cheftestants masking their apathy about Patti LaBelle's presence with a thin (the thinnest!) veil of awkwardly feigned enthusiasm. She is a national treasure, you assholes! Chris J's buttcrack! Chris C dissing his mom's cooking on teevee. "My mom totally couldn't cook...and she was frankly kind of a slut." Tom Colicchio telling Heather, "Well, BEV used the pressure cooker." Oh SNAP! Ed telling Ty-Lör Boring that he's going to "show his balls" by doing a vegetarian dish. 1. No you're not. 2. No one wants to see your balls, Ed! Keep your balls away from the food!

image of former Top Chef contestant Fabio Viviani saying: 'This is Top Chef, not Top Balls.'

Exactly.

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