So, George Zimmerman Granted an Interview to Sean Hannity…

by Shaker BrianWS, who may or may not become a full-time contributor someday based on the roll of a 20-sided die, the other 19 sides of which all inexplicably feature images of Robin Williams characters. What will happen if he rolls Mork? What will happen if he rolls Patch Adams? What will happen if he rolls Mrs. Doubtfire? NOBODY KNOWS!

[Content Note: Racism; eliminationist violence.]

Sometimes I can be thoughtful when I guest post, and sometimes I just need to RAGE. This is one of the latter times.

George Zimmerman, who murdered Trayvon Martin in late February, gave a disgusting, pathetic, and self-serving interview to Fox News' Sean Hannity last night, and, outside of sharing with us how killing Martin was all just part of "God's plan" (yeah, I'll come back to that), it was mostly Hannity asking leading, provocative questions, and Zimmerman doubling down and digging in on the racist fuckery. Not much groundbreaking material, but too gross to ignore.

Because I don't have a full eleven hours to detail every nuance of Zimmerman's contemptible self-pity and excuse-making, I'll just mention a few of the worst parts and leave it to Shakers to have at the rest of it in the comments. I mean, literally, every answer Zimmerman gives can be ripped to pieces.

1.) When asked by Hannity what made him think Trayvon Martin was suspicious, Zimmerman answered: "I felt he was suspicious because it was raining, um, he was in between houses, cutting in between houses...he was walking very leisurely for the weather. Um, it didn't look like he was a resident that went to check their mail and got caught in the rain and was hurrying back home. He didn't look like a fitness fanatic that would train in the rain."

Really? Let's make short work of this one.

Personal story time: To be honest, I like walking in the rain. I find the notion of it very romantic, even when I'm alone. I have been known to go for walks in the rain all by myself just because I want to. Because it makes me feel good and it calms me. Not to check the mail. Not to increase my fitness. Just because.

Yet, anyone who would suggest that Zimmerman would've called the police after seeing me leisurely walking through the rain that night is being disingenuous at best. People can walk through the rain for any infinite number of reasons, but the catch is that Martin was a young black man. In George Zimmerman's neighborhood.

2.) When asked what he would tell Trayvon Martin's parents: "I'm sorry. My wife and I don't have any children. I have nephews that I love more than life. I love them more than myself. And I know when they were born, it was a different unique bond and love that I have with them, and I love my children even though that they aren't born yet. I am sorry that they buried their child. I can't imagine what it must feel like. And I pray for them daily."

Look at how neatly he removes himself from responsibility for Martin's death: "I am sorry they buried their child." Listening to that, you wouldn't even know Zimmerman is the one who murdered that child. It's such a passive voice, bullshit answer, centering his feelings about his future fucking unborn children as some sort of comparison to the love that Martin's parents felt for their son, who was a living, breathing, existing person until George Zimmerman killed him.

3.) Then: "But I do wish there was something, anything I could have done that wouldn't have put me in the position where I had to take his life....(addresses camera head-on) I hate to think that because of this incident, because of my actions, it has polarized and divided America."

I can think of literally a thousand things that Zimmerman could've done that wouldn't have put him in the position to kill Trayvon Martin—but I think I only need one: How about not being a racist fuckhead who, because of Martin's "suspicious" blackness, stalked him, confronted him, and killed him? See how easy that was?

And note, too, that he hates to see that his actions polarized America. Not sorry that his actions ended the life of a teenager, but that the nation's racists were obliged to out themselves in his defense. "Sorry I blew your cover, Racist of America!" What a jerk.

4.) Last, but so very much not least, when asked by Hannity about whether he had any regrets (spoiler alert: Nope!): "I feel it was all God's plan."

Well, FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCK YOU!

This whole interview made my skin crawl, with Hannity taking his Very Serious Issues tone of voice, and the two of them going back and forth looking like it was taking every bit of willpower they had to not interrupt the interview to high-five each other.

And I couldn't stop thinking about the exacerbating injustice of Zimmerman getting to tell the only side of the story there is to hear, owing to the fact that he murdered Trayvon Martin.

Have at it.