Two More Entries in the Naming Series

1. Let's Talk about Names: Patricia.

Latinos live on the crossroads of two different cultures. In our adopted country we want to keep our traditions alive but the need to assimilate is oftentimes much greater.

To answer everyone's question on whether or not I will change my last name when I get married, the simple answer is no. My name was already changed when I moved to the United States, and while I have no sentimental attachment it, it is the name I first learned how to write in kindergarten, the name I used through my adolescence when I won spelling bees and perfect attendance awards, and the name I used to introduce myself to my future husband.

I've grown to see my name as an extension of my identity.

...Not all women feel the same way about their last names. Some do not want to be associated with their families, others simply enjoy the idea of a new identity, and others feel pressured by their society. The truth is that changing names should be a personal decision, but oftentimes societal pressures can become burdensome. In a society where women feel pressured to "have it all" we need to understand that letting one thing go does not make us less of a feminist.

Go read the whole thing! It's so good!

2. Let's Talk About Names: Hafidha.

I was still "Little Heidi" in their eyes. Still the fat and happy baby whose cheeks they had pinched; maybe they had even done me the kindness of feeding me or changing my diaper. I let them call me "Heidi"; after all, what did it matter? They may have been family but they were still strangers to me, and the likelihood of seeing them again was remote. I read their attempts at affection and familiarity as clutches at the past, a common behavior of adults. They weren't interested in who I was now, so my old name served them well enough.

...As a child, when I allowed relatives to call me "Heidi," I was using that old name in a kind of autotomous fashion. Autotomy is the act of an animal shedding some part of its body to escape a threat. The predator is left holding just a small part of what it wanted, meanwhile the part that is shed regenerates on the animal that was in danger. "Heidi" was useful in that it was a part of me I could do without, and I let these people I barely knew have it; they might have thought they'd got a hold of me, but in reality I was no longer connected.

Go read the whole thing! It's so good!

I am loving this series so much. My profound appreciation to Grace and Jess for all the work they've done conceiving and producing the roundtable, and to all the amazing participants.