News from the Conservative Outrage Machine

#1: The IRS was giving "extra scrutiny" to Tea Party groups. This is supposed to be a huge scandal, and we're all supposed to be totally fucking outraged. Except, here's the thing: Tea Party conservatives are explicitly anti-tax. The IRS is tasked with tax collection. So maybe it, you know, makes sense that the IRS would target for greater scrutiny tax-exemption applications from explicitly anti-tax groups? Especially groups that are running their own candidates, given that the charitable exemption has very specific rules about direct political advocacy.

Frankly, the scandal as far as I'm concerned isn't that Tea Party groups were given extra scrutiny; it's that every group applying for charitable tax exemptions aren't held to that standard. (See: Religious organizations.)

Anyway. Don't listen to the liberal liars! This isn't about increased scrutiny being given to a group with decidedly blurry lines (to put it politely) between their (allegedly) charitable arms and political arms! This is about how Obama is a socialist who will come after your guns next! Or something.

#2: BENGHAZI!!!!1!!!11!!!!eleventy!!!!!1!!!! Last November, I wrote: "There may be legitimate criticisms to be made about the administration's handling of Benghazi, but it's virtually impossible to extricate them from the amount of mud conservatives are splattering all over anything in sight, hoping some will stick." Ha ha rinse and repeat FOREVERRRRRRRRRR.

Former Secretary of Defense Robert Gates: "We don't have a ready force standing by in the Middle East, and so getting somebody there in a timely way would have been very difficult, if not impossible. ...I would not have approved sending an aircraft, a single aircraft, over Benghazi under those circumstances. ...Send[ing] some small number of special forces or other troops in without knowing what the environment is, without knowing what the threat is, without having any intelligence in terms of what is actually going on on the ground, would have been very dangerous. ...[Critics suggestions of what the Obama administration should have done are] sort of a cartoonish impression of military capabilities and military forces." Ha ha ya think?!

Truly, at this point the penny should have dropped about what these Benghazi hearings are really all about: A transparent attempt to generate enough "suspicion" that something was so badly bungled it means HILLARY CLINTON SHOULD NEVER BE PRESIDENT!

Welp, good luck, knuckleheads. Apparently you haven't noticed she eats invented scandals for breakfast.

I guess it's easier than actually finding a Republican candidate who can beat her fairly.

Provided she even runs. And ha ha I can't imagine why she wouldn't! Her country respects her and appreciates her service SO MUCH!