We're Taking a Little Break

So, I need a break. Like, a total break. Not a "we'll still have open threads and they'll still be moderated and I'm still accountable for anything that goes sideways, so I'm never really on vacation" kind of a break, but a real break where I am really detached and really away. Because I am beyond burned out; I am utterly depleted of resources to keep going without some time away.

And the contributors and moderators, who volunteer their time to this community with a fierce and abundant generosity, could use a break, too.

So we are taking the next two weeks off.

I realize that this community is a central part of a lot of people's lives, and that shutting down completely means disconnection from daily support on which a lot of people rely, so I am genuinely sorry that my needing time to engage in some self-care causes a temporary disruption in the community. There is no good way to reconcile that.

All I can say is that getting my head out of this space—and all the attendant personal stuff it requires my navigating behind the scenes—for awhile is a good investment for this community in the long term.

Take care and see you soon.

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The Virtual Pub Is Open

[Explanations: lol your fat. pathetic anger bread. hey your gay.]

TFIF, Shakers!

Belly up to the bar,
and name your poison!

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I'll Sit With You

Last night, Dudley crawled up next to my outstretched legs on the sofa, tucking his body behind them, and rested his chin on my ankle with a contented sigh.

When Dudley first came to live with us, in April of 2010, he was so desperately frightened of my touching him that he would roll onto his side and pee on himself if I got near him. I spent long hours lying on the floor beside his crate, where he felt safe, synchronizing my breathing to his, quiet and still. Not looking at him, just being there, to reassure him I would never hurt him.

One day, he tentatively emerged, and he laid down beside me on the floor. I put my hand on his side, across a long scar the origins of which we do not know, and matched him breath for breath. There we laid, until he let me know he needed to go out, and I put on his leash without making him fearful for the first time.

It wasn't until almost two years later that he initiated an intimate snuggle with me, after Zelda gave him an appreciation for seeking out a cuddle with Two-Legs.

Now, just past our three-year anniversary of finding one another, there is no trace of the frightened dog who arrived.

His foster dad, J, who is also president of the rescue, told me just today when I sent him this picture, that Dudley's progress "astounds me. His may be the greatest transformation I have seen."

Not long ago, J asked me if he could give my contact information to a couple who had rescued another "spooky" greyhound, C. C wasn't as shy and scared as Dudley had been, but still having problems, and his guardians were seeking advice. Naturally I said yes. I spoke to one-half of the couple, S, and listened to the issues they were having with C, and I recommended a few things, including the exercise of lying on the floor beside C, matching his breathing, being there. S thanked me and said they'd give it a try.

A few days later, I got an email from S, telling me that they were already seeing improvements. C was starting to trust them. A dog who they'd been told would never take treats from human hands was eating from their hands. A few days later, another email, detailing even more improvements. They started calling C their "miracle dog." I got pictures of C, looking happy and confident in the backyard of his new home. All the blubs.

The things my dog has taught me. He has taught me how to run at someone's side; he has taught me how to be there, still and patient, to make a safe space.

As his whiskers tickled the skin on the top of my foot, I was overwhelmed with gratitude that this gentle creature came into my life. And I resolved to remember, always, that he could only trust me because I made myself trustworthy first.

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And Also

[Content Note: Rape culture; violent misogyny.]

Anna North has a piece in Salon about why journalism's elite corps is still overwhelmingly dominated by men, and her theory (or one theory, among others) is that famous male journalists get that way by stoking controversy, which is much more dangerous for women to do.

But there's another thing you need to do to become the next Andrew Sullivan: stoke controversy. The most successful branded journalists stake out provocative claims frequently and aggressively, without worrying too much about whether they'll eventually be proved wrong. And this is much riskier for women than it is for men.

There's no question that men who take controversial positions in the media come in for loud and vigorous criticism. Women who do so, however, can expect rape threats. They can expect to be told that they are too fat or ugly to have a valid opinion on anything. They can expect the suggestion that instead of speaking, they might prefer to fellate their male readers. If they are nonwhite, they can expect other, racialized forms of abuse.

So while controversy can be a rough-and-tumble game for some male commentators, for women it's a decision to put their mental health — and sometimes their physical safety — on the line. For a female journalist, doing careful, reasoned work that raises interesting questions — and waiting till you have everything ironclad before you publish anything — can be a lot safer than taking strong, brash stands right out of the gate. Women who do this may not be able to avoid harassment entirely, but they're more likely to escape the worst of it.

...It's easy to say that the solution to this is simply for women to step up, to marshal that bravery and charge into the space dominated by men, consequences be damned. I would love to see more women do this. But I also know it is not necessarily a rational choice. Nearly everything in society is set up to reward women who are conciliatory and punish women who are not. Nice women may not get their own editorial operations at ESPN, but they are more likely to get the approval of their peers. Confrontational women get pictures of their beaten-up faces posted on the Internet.

All of that, yes. Although I will note that even women whose only "controversial" position is being a woman are targeted by violent misogynists, too.

Which brings me to the observation that being a female writer who is routinely threatened, and who is routinely told that she is too fat and ugly to have a valid opinion, creates additional concerns for people in editorial positions when they're considering whom to hire.

If I'm known as a writer who comes with the baggage of determined silencers who lob rape threats at me every time I publish something, editors for online spaces will weigh whatever cachet I bring to their publication against whatever fuckery I bring to their comments section.

Any halfway competent editor for any publication which tries to maintain even the most cursory appearance of "civil debate" knows that hiring a "controversial" female writer who's incessantly targeted by violent misogyny will necessitate additional moderating resources. And many of them will end up calculating it's just easier to hire a dude.

I publish a high volume of content every day; I do not hesitate to take "strong, brash stands" on controversial subjects; I am not intimidated by the "rough-and-tumble" of it all; I'm not afraid to put myself out there, and be confrontational, and risk not being seen as "nice." But I can be the kind of writer who gets premiere commentary jobs all day every day for the rest of my life, and it's not going to make a damn bit of difference if there aren't editors who are willing to invest in me because I'm the target of harassment.

The truth is, there are plenty of female writers with the stomach for it. I'm just not sure the same can be said about editorial decision-makers who prefer to crown kings.

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Fort Hood Shooting Update: Hasan Convicted

[Content Note: Terrorism; guns.]

In late 2009, Army Major Nidal Hasan went on a shooting spree at Fort Hood, Texas. Earlier today, a military jury convicted him of 13 counts of premeditated murder.

The jurors deliberated fewer than seven hours over two days to hand down a verdict against Hasan, who admitted to targeting soldiers he was set to deploy with to Afghanistan to protect the Taliban and its leaders. The shooting rampage occurred at a deployment processing center.

The court-martial will reconvene at 4 p.m. ET. There is a question of whether the conviction on all 32 counts of premeditated attempted murder was unanimous. It is unclear at this time whether the court will address that question then, according to a Fort Hood public affairs spokesman.

The court-martial next moves to the penalty phase, where Hasan -- acting as his own attorney -- will have the opportunity to address the jurors considering whether he should be executed for his actions.

I am not a supporter of capital punishment, so I would personally like to see Hasan sentenced to a very long stay in a safe facility where he can never harm anyone else ever again.

I feel like I should feel happy or relieved about this conviction, but I don't. I just feel something I guess is best described as sad. I hope the conviction brings the survivors of the shooting, and the family, friends, and colleagues of the people who died in the shooting, some measure of justice and peace.

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Friday Blogaround

This blogaround is brought to you by a very naughty beaglemix.

Jason: Humanizing the Religious Other: Pope Francis Takes a Step Forward

[CN: Rape culture, abuse, misogyny, racism, fat hatred] Janell: The Rape of Harriet Tubman

[CN: transphobia] Lianne:GA Allows Transgender Girl To Use—oh my! The Girl’s Room

[CN: rape, rape culture, endangerment of survivors] Iulia: Rapist Given Paternity Rights to Victim's Child

[CN: racism, homophobia] Angry Asian Man: Weird-Ass Craigslist Posting, Part 22: "Secrets of the Orient"

Peter: Banned Dances (from 1912)

The History Blog: Pre-Raphaelite Mural Found in William Morris’ Red House

Jag: Is Economics More Like History than Physics?

Joseph: Ancient Pottery Fragments Show That Prehistoric Humans Used Spices Too

Ian: Speak, recipe: Reading Cookbooks as Life Histories

Leave your links and recommendations in comments...

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Daily Dose of Cute

Livsy, just being cute. Which is her specialty.
As always, please feel welcome and encouraged to share pix of the fuzzy, feathered, or scaled members of your family in comments.

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Two-Minute Nostalgia Sublime

McAlmont & Butler: "Yes"

This week's TMNS brought to you by '90s Britpop.

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In the News

Here is some stuff in the news today!

[Content Note: War; war crimes] President Obama calls reports of the use of chemical weapons in Syria a "big event of grave concern." He says that the US is still verifying what happened, but: "I think it is fair to say that, as difficult as the problem is, this is something that is going to require America's attention and hopefully the entire international community's attention."

In other presidential news, President Obama recommended that Congress watch some Schoolhouse Rock and start getting shit done.

[CN: Transphobic violence] A suspect has been named, but has not yet been detained, by police in the murder of trans actress Domonique Newburn.

[CN: Hostility to agency] Ireland's first legal abortion to save the life of a pregnant woman happened this week. That is great news, grimly tainted by lamentation that this basic healthcare right required other women to die and sustained international outrage before it was begrudgingly legalized.

Ben Stiller and Helen Childress, the director and writer respectively of Reality Bites, are bringing the 90's Gen X cult film to television as a comedy series. Welp, that sounds terrible!

Republicans' best solution for the national healthcare crisis continues to be telling people without insurance to go to the emergency room.

[CN: Sexual assult] The US Naval will "integrate sexual assault prevention into its academic program in an effort combat high rates of sexual assault in the military." That's good news, provided that their sexual assault prevention doesn't consist of telling female cadets to "Pay attention to your surroundings" and "Be prepared to get yourself home."

And finally! Your new Batman is Ben Affleck. On a scale of zero to one biebillion, how many nopes do you give this casting? I give it a biebillion nopes and a bonus whut.

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Quote of the Day

[Content Note: Rape culture.]

"One of these accusers said that he grabbed both of her hands and asked for a date. If you took out the words 'Bob Filner' and inserted the word 'Ryan Gosling,' you wouldn't have a problem."—CNN contributor and criminal defense attorney Darren Kavinoky, discussing the Filner harassment case with Faith Jenkins and Don Lemon, who both told him he was an asshole. (I'm paraphrasing.)

Sexual harassment is not a compliment. And it is not determined by how "cute" someone thinks a harasser is.

It is determined by consent (or the lack thereof), by safety (or the lack thereof), by what is appropriate in a professional setting. If Ryan Gosling grabbed a female member of a film crew without her consent, and held her in place while he asked her out despite her evident discomfort, she'd feel sexually harassed, and it wouldn't make a damn bit of difference how cute he is.

It might well make a difference in how likely he'd be to be prosecuted, though—thanks to narratives about how good-looking men don't "need" to harass (or assault) anyone, and how women "should be" flattered by any attention from a good-looking man.

This is rape culture.

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Good Riddance

[Content Note: Sexual harassment.]

Democratic San Diego Mayor Bob Filner, after having been accused by at least 16 women of sexual harassment and/or assault, has "agreed to resign as part of a deal reached this week with city officials."

How neat for him that his resignation was something to which he was allowed to agree.

On his way out, someone hand Mr. Filner a memo that alerts him to the fact that he does not own women.

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Open Thread

Hosted by a pig scrubby holder.

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Question of the Day

I was watching this documentary last night, Americans in Bed, which features a bunch of couples talking about love and sex and parenting and infidelity and stuff, and one of the things they were asked to talk about was their definition of (romantic) love. As we were lying in bed last night, I asked Iain how he would define love. He replied, "Admiring someone so much you are moved to behave selflessly toward them. That's the best I got at 12:30 at night." And then he kissed me and fell asleep.

I thought that was pretty good, for 12:30 at night or any other time.

So: How would you define love, romantic or otherwise?

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"Woman's World"

Below, the video for Cher's new single, "Woman's World."


[Lyrics here.]
Video Description: Cher, with hair of flowing garbage, stands in the middle of a blue stage, singing and dancing. Parts of her body are interchanged with parts of other women's bodies, like a living Fashion Plates model, and sometimes she is replaced entirely by another woman. The women are of different races, ages, sizes, and abilities. There are back-up dancers who sometimes dance with Cher.

What do you think of this video? (There's no one right answer!) I was pleasantly surprised by the diversity of women included in the video! Good job, Cher! But I'm not sure that the message reads as "solidarity" as much as it does "interchangeability." But given the usual roles women are offered in music videos *cough*, this is comparatively tremendous.

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This is a real thing in the world.

by Shaker Mod aforalpha

[Content Note: Discussion of near-miss auto accidents.]

[Click image to view product page.]
This will never be involved in any traffic accidents. *that face* A couple of thoughts:

1. Distracted driving is a big enough problem as it is. I know people resist the idea that it's a problem, but I've nearly been hit, both as a passenger and in my car, by drivers who didn't even notice the near miss because they were so absorbed in something else. I've also been the passenger in a car with a driver who was on the phone who didn't notice pedestrians, made unsafe lane changes, etc.

2. It's a sad thing that people are being encouraged to turn their cars into offices. Some people's work will necessitate that some amount of work happen in their car—salespeople and so on (though the steering wheel desk that is advertized as a place to eat made me wonder what ever happened to park benches and then I remembered that we don't believe in investing in our country). But aside from those very specialized circumstances, it's just this push to squeeze every last drop out of people rather than just, you know, hiring more people.

3. The company is called AutoExec, but I'm pretty sure that most autoexecs just hold their tablets with their hands in the back seat while someone else drives.

Discuss.

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You Don't Even Know How Hard It Is to Babysit Your Kids

[Content Note: Sexism; gender essentialism.]

Did you know that men have to learn how to parents, unlike women, who are born with the innate knowledge of how to take care of a baby? It's true! That's why there are no books for expectant or adoptive mothers, and why lactation consultants are just one example of the many things that do not exist in the world for new mothers, because they are unnecessary, due to our natural gift for all things parenting. Which men don't share. Obviously. Because they are men.

Another thing that's hard for men, besides the terrifyingly steep learning curve of being responsible for a new life which is something women definitely do not experience, is finding a good work-life balance. That is really hard for male parents. Who, by the way, also don't get enough credit for all the work they do.

I mean, why are we even giving women credit for parenting at all? When you really think about it, women are born to parent and men have to work at it, so giving women credit is like congratulating someone on continuing to breathe or take a dump. Women are just doing what they're hard-wired to do, but men are overcoming millennia of EVOLUTION to change diapers.

It's called science. Look it up.

And then get busy baking some cookies, ladies.

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Nope

[Content Note: Racism; violence; rape culture; appropriation.]

In case you are not aware of my feelings about Law & Order: SVU, I hate it. Like, a lot. It is my go-to show when I need to hate-watch something, because I hate it SO MUCH and it gives me ALL THE THINGS about which to scream at the TV.

Also, it is ALWAYS ON, in endless marathons, so I can redirect my rage at it pretty much any minute of any hour of any day.

Anyway.

Check out this shit:

Law & Order: SVU never shies away from keeping up with the cultural zeitgeist.

"Keeping up with the cultural zeitgeist" is an almost perfect euphemism for "exploiting the most gruesome stories of the harm human beings do to one another that are currently in the news." But I digress.

Wednesday, pictures from the SVU set emerged on BuzzFeed and speculation mounted about whether or not the images might suggest that the show was taking on the controversial George Zimmerman trial so soon. In fact, the SVU writers have taken things one step further and combined two of the year's biggest headlines: The trial of Zimmerman over the killing of Florida teen Trayvon Martin and the Paula Deen scandal.

Ha ha sounds terrific! What could go wrong? This show is definitely known for sensitivity rather than sensationalism, so I'm sure it will be AMAZEBALLS, as the kids say!

"[Jeffrey] Tambor is a defense attorney representing a very high-profile celebrity woman chef who thought she was being pursued by a rapist and turned around it was a teenager. And she shot him," said [Executive Producer Warren Leight] in an interview with EW. "There's a lot of stop and frisk elements to that as well."

Neat! I hope they find a way to cram in some totally trenchant commentary about the decimation of the Voting Rights Act. Maybe the Paula Deen proxy could fart on the Statue of Liberty. SYMBOLISM.

They won't be shying away from the big questions either, according to Leight. "Is racial profiling justifiable? Can self-defense involve racial profiling? We're diving right into that," he said. "Can that happen in New York? Absolutely."

Be prepared for the episode to divide audiences. According to Leight, it even exposed divisions within the SVU team. "When the script was published it became a litmus test for everybody here," he said. "It was really interesting to see people read that script and have different interpretations about who did what and whether or not they deserved prison for it. It was fascinating."

I'll bet! What a fascinating episode it will be for us all.

"Something something the government and privacy."—Munch. JACKPOT.

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And Then This Happened

[Content Note: Misogyny; disablism.]

In my ongoing (and never-ending) series about why this female atheist (*points thumbs at self*) has no interest in movement atheism, I present this exchange, in comments at Libby Anne's place, between Lunch Meat, a self-identified religious woman, and Jack Kolinski, an atheist man who "want[s] to cure religion and [has] written an easy-and-fun-to-read book explaining how everyone can cure themselves and others of this insidious, malevolent mind disease."

Libby Anne has written extensively about that comment thread, and the dynamic of atheist men full of white knight sexism who want to save religious women from themselves, here. Go read it, because it's really great!

There are a lot (a "small but vocal minority," I'm sure) of atheist men who believe that they need to rescue religious women because they are too stupid or brainwashed or weak or some other charming underestimation to know what is best for themselves. (Protip: When your "feminist" argument is indistinguishable from anti-choice rhetoric, you have derailed from anything resembling feminism.) Obviously, this is objectionable to religious women.

But it is objectionable to me, too. Even though I am an atheist woman who has written about the specific harm I experienced being raised in a particular religious tradition. Because my experience is not universal. And because I am keenly aware of the colonialist and racist dynamics that underwrite much of this white male atheist savior bullshit. And because I am a feminist, and thus I want to give women choices, and trust them to make the best choices for themselves.

I don't have any interest in telling women what they should do, or what they should believe.

Because I don't own women. And neither does Jack Kolinski. Nor any of his oppressively chivalrous brothers.

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Shaker Gardens Thread: August Edition

What's growing, Shakers? It's August, which means heat for much of the northern hemisphere, and cool temperatures in much of the southern. Here in Tennegeorgialina, it's been an unusually cool and rainy summer. I certainly don't mind it temperature-wise, and we need the rain. It's been a little hard on heat-loving Southern crops, however. So my tomatoes have withered from bacterial rot and my melons didn't fruit at all. But as you can see from the picture above, I can't complain about winter squashes, legumes, and the ever-tough zinnias.

In fact, for plants that can handle constant rain, it's been a good year. My banana plants, which live in pots so we can bring them in during the winter, are very happy. They're thriving along with the potted pineapples, pomegranate, and miniature citrus trees. My second planting of sunflowers (you can see one peeping over the top of the banana tree) are pretty happy too.

The luffahs are doing well, too, although they're behind where they were last year, thanks to the cooler weather. Wilts and rots don't seem to faze them at all. In fact, I have volunteer vines springing up in the areas where I cleaned the gourds last year! The vines and flowers are pretty, although I don't think the volunteers will produce any gourds. This is my second year growing luffahs, and they're definitely on my keeper list. In addition to being disease-resistant, they shrug off the bugs that killed several of my plants this year, such as leaf-footed bugs, pickleworm, and squash bugs.

But although the above-mentioned pests and the rain finally did in my trumpet zucchini and cushaws, my cheese pumpkins and Seminole pumpkins have thrived. One of the cheese pumpkins (which look like a round of cheese, above) took a little pickleworm damage, but most of them managed to avoid it. My other successful pumpkins are the Seminoles, also a moschata variety, resistant to the squash vine borer. These are an old Southern winter squash, and they're amazing. The skin is unusually thick and tough, meaning that although lots of insects try to bite them, I've yet to find a hole where they actually got through, and I still have two on the vine. They're small -- a bit bigger than a large grapefruit-- but they're supposed to keep for up to a year, which is nothing short of miraculous in the Southern climate. They are also reputed to make tasty pies. I can't wait to find out!

Let me close with one of the "cactus" flowered zinnias I've tried for the first time this year. The flowers are certainly unusual and quite striking in the garden, and they make lovely cut flowers too! They're really nice in an arrangement with giant zinnias and "State Fair" variety as well. Once again I find zinnias are one of the most reliable annuals I can plant here, along with marigolds and chrysanthemums.

So, Shakers... how does your garden grow? Whether you have garden beds, pots on the windowsill or balcony, or are just planning a garden, feel free to share your projects in this thread! [Commenting Note: Please be respectful of the fact that other people's gardening priorities may differ from yours, whether that means prioritizing space, yields, conserving water, organic methods, or any other set of concerns.]

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Daily Dose of Cute

This dog. I love her so.
As always, please feel welcome and encouraged to share pix of the fuzzy, feathered, or scaled members of your family in comments.

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Two-Minute Nostalgia Sublime

Elastica: "Connection"

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In The News

Here is some stuff in the news today!

Professor James Franco has a new show that will air on Ovation TV whatever that is. It's called "James Franco Presents," and here is Professor James Franco making the big announcement on Instagram. What—did you think James Franco wouldn't announce his new show on Instagram in extreme close-up using the most unenthusiastic voice that be humanly mustered by the greatest actor of our generation? You're so weird.

[Content Note: Sexual harassment] Another day; another allegation of sexual harassment against Democratic San Diego Mayor Bob Filner, who still refuses to resign. Although they're definitely mediating about it! Take your time! It's not like the mayor of your town compulsively assaulting women should imbue anyone with a sense of urgency or anything.

Whooooooooops! "For several years, the National Security Agency unlawfully gathered tens of thousands of e-mails and other electronic communications between Americans as part of a now-revised collection method, according to a 2011 secret court opinion. The redacted 85-page opinion, which was declassified by U.S. intelligence officials on Wednesday, states that, based on NSA estimates, the spy agency may have been collecting as many as 56,000 'wholly domestic' communications each year."

Actor Wentworth Miller discloses that he is gay and will not be attending the St. Petersburg International Film Festival because the Russian government are assholes to queer people.

[CN: Misogyny; racism] The Root's Keli Goff talks to civil rights leader Gloria Richardson about sexism during the March on Washington, the erosion of voting rights, President Obama's civil rights record, and other fascinating stuff.

Some weirdo dentist wants to clone John Lennon from his rotten tooth. Gross.

[CN: Disablism; classism; reference to joking about rape, murder, the Holocaust] In case you had a smidgeon of affinity left for Ricky Gervais (and why would you, because he is a garbage nightmare of colossal proportions), read this profile of him in the Hollywood Reporter. That oughta do it!

Here is a great story about two great dogs who rescued a woman who'd flipped her car on a quiet road. Yay!

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Quote of the Day

"I am Chelsea Manning."—Chelsea Manning, nee Bradley, in a statement publicly disclosing that she is trans and would like to begin transitioning. Yesterday, Manning was sentenced to 35 years in prison after leaking classified documents containing information about the United States government's foreign policy and diplomatic operations.

In a decent nation where prisoners were treated with dignity, where healthcare were considered a right rather than a privilege, and where transitioning were universally considered basic healthcare for trans* people who want to transition, the path for Chelsea Manning moving forward would be clear. But I don't know what will happen in the US, which is not that nation.

The full text of Manning's statement:

Subject: The Next Stage of My Life

I want to thank everybody who has supported me over the last three years. Throughout this long ordeal, your letters of support and encouragement have helped keep me strong. I am forever indebted to those who wrote to me, made a donation to my defense fund, or came to watch a portion of the trial. I would especially like to thank Courage to Resist and the Bradley Manning Support Network for their tireless efforts in raising awareness for my case and providing for my legal representation.

As I transition into this next phase of my life, I want everyone to know the real me. I am Chelsea Manning. I am a female. Given the way that I feel, and have felt since childhood, I want to begin hormone therapy as soon as possible. I hope that you will support me in this transition. I also request that, starting today, you refer to me by my new name and use the feminine pronoun (except in official mail to the confinement facility). I look forward to receiving letters from supporters and having the opportunity to write back.

Thank you,

Chelsea E. Manning

I'm expecting there will be some teaspooning opportunities emerging shortly—petitions to be signed, donations to be made, letters to be written to members of Congress on Manning's behalf. Please feel welcome and encouraged to leave them in comments, as and when you see them.

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Today in Post-Jesus America

[Content note: Christian supremacy]

In case you weren't driving through Rochester, NY, last week or otherwise missed it, I figured you might want to know that the Obama administration filed an brief with the U.S. Supreme Court asking it to strike down an appeals court's limitations on participatory prayer at municipal meetings. JURIST has a nice summary with links to all the relevant documentation, but here's my summary.

Greece is a 96,000 person suburb of Rochester. Since 1999, the town has opened town meetings with a participatory prayer. They town didn't have any sort of written policy on how this was to happen. Basically, the town compiled a list of religious leaders who were willing to deliver the prayer (the list only contained Christians), and someone from the town would work hir way down the list, inviting people to lead upcoming council sessions in prayer.

In 2008, a pair of town residents sued, claiming that this amounted to an establishment of religion.

Here's a necessary bit of background:

One of the last big courts case to take up this issue happened when member of the Nebraska legislature sued the state over its practice of legislative prayer. That went to SCOTUS in 1983. (For those of you folks who weren't born or were coked out on Zubaz during the 80s, it wasn't one of the United States' finer decades constitutional law-wise.) SCOTUS ruled that legislative prayer was such an established practice, that it didn't really constitute a establishment of religion. Or something. Because Jesus. (Those sounds you hear are justices Thurgood Marshall and William Brennan rolling their eyes, BTW.)

So yeah, the residents took the town to the district court, which promptly threw out the case because precedence, Jesus, Swatch watches, wev.

The appeals court had a slightly different take.

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Open Thread

Hosted by a pig wash mitt.

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Question of the Day

Suggested by Shaker TheDeviantE: "Who is your favorite 'unknown' (or 'under-appreciated') figure from history (aka dead) and why?"

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Wednesday Blogaround

This blogaround brought to you by flattened pennies.

Recommended reading:

Tressie: Bulletproof Big Mommas: Black Women Cannot Stop Bullets #atl [Content Note: The post at this link includes discussion of gun violence, and dehumanizing racist/misogynist narratives.]

Sharona: Results of Congressional "Fishing Expedition" Show Abortion Is Already Highly Regulated, Overwhelmingly Safe

Brittany: You Have No Idea [Content Note: The post at this link describes feelings experienced by the author and many other survivors of sexual violence.]

Flavia: Some Thoughts about Sexual Normativity in Food Writing [Content Note: The post at this link includes discussion of heterocentrism, ablism, and food withholding.]

Alan: American Workers Have Seen a "Lost Decade" in Wage Growth

FMF News: Indonesian Official Proposes Virginity Test for Access to Education [Content Note: The post at this link includes discussion of misogyny and sexual assault.]

Jamilah: The Washington, D.C., Football Team Didn't Exactly Approve This Shirt [Content Note: The post at this link includes discussion of racism and Native appropriation and racist/appropriative imagery.]

And last but not least! I feel a little weird putting this in the blogaround, because there is something very nice about me personally in it (thank you, Jess! I love you!), but I think everyone here is pretty well aware that: 1. Jessica Luther and I are friends; and 2. Jessica Luther is super fucking awesome and a fierce activist and generally amazing. So please know I am linking this because of her, not because she mentions me.

Danielle Nelson interviews Jessica Luther: Listen, Fight and Grow a Thick Skin. Read it read it read it!!!

Leave your links and recommendations in comments...

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The Onion Fails Again, Or Why Sexual Abuse Is Not a Joke

by Shaker Mary, who can be found fighting the good fight on Twitter: @OHTheMaryD.

[Content Note: Rape jokes; misogynist slur; discussion of sexual violence statistics.]

On Tuesday, August 20th, The Onion ran a piece titled, "Adolescent Girl Reaching Age Where She Starts Exploring Stepfather's Body." Yes, it is as horrible as you think it is. I refuse to link to the original article, but here's the gist:

"It can be awkward and even a little scary for an adolescent girl when she experiences all these strange new feelings and starts to notice the sexual desires of her mother's husband…"

[…]

"But it's all part of growing up, and she should know that she is taking a very important step in life. It won't be long before her childhood is gone forever." Denton added that if the eighth-grader is confused or troubled by such experiences, she should try talking to friends her age who are going through the exact same thing.

In trying to use satire to critique the way the media covers sex abuse cases, The Onion focused on a fictional victim, sexualized young girls, and missed the mark completely. This can be added to the list of failures from a publication that thought it was the height of satire to call a 9-year-old Black girl a "cunt".

A 13-year-old in a sexual relationship with an adult is nothing to joke about. Incest is a very real and hellish experience that far too many people either have or are currently living through and to satirize that is not only offensive, it's disgusting and dangerous.

The rape and sexual abuse of children is not a joke.

It's not a joke when, according to the Administration for Children and Families, 18.5% of 9- to 11-year-olds, 26.3% of 12- to 14-year-olds, and 21.8% of 15- to 17-year-olds are sexually abused (these are conservative estimates, since sexual abuse is one of the most underreported crimes).

It's not a joke when, according to the American Psychological Association, 30% of the perpetrators of child sexual abuse are family members and the presence of a stepfather in the home doubles the risk of sexual victimization for girls.

It's not a joke when children with disabilities are 4 to 10 times more vulnerable to sexual abuse then non-disabled children.

We live in a society where news reporters go on national TV and lament the lost "promising futures" of convicted rapists and say very little about the teenage girl who was brutalized by them. Where, in a small town in Indiana, a pregnant 14-year-old is called a "slut" and a "whore" by her neighbors just because she's a rape victim.

We, as a society, already fail to treat rape and sexual assault/abuse claims with the gravity they deserve, continually shifting the blame off the perpetrators and blaming the victim. We have no business satirizing something that is already not taken seriously.

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Shakers Are Neat

I just got back from lunch with Shakers Talonas and The_Great_Indoors, who are visiting relatives in the area. We had an excellent time. I love meeting Shakers whom I've known for years, but never met. Which is weird. But you know what I mean.

Thank you so much for lunch, Talonas and The_Great_Indoors! It was lovely to meet you.

Shakers are neat.

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Daily Dose of Cute

Yesterday, while I was chatting on the phone with Spudsy, I managed to snap a couple of pictures of Tilsy that show off her goofy side. Don't let the regal photos fool you: This is her true personality!

"What?"


lol this cat
As always, please feel welcome and encouraged to share pix of the fuzzy, feathered, or scaled members of your family in comments.

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Two-Minute Nostalgia Sublime

Pulp: "Common People"

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In The News

Here is some stuff in the news today!

[Content Note: Guns] The NRA has amassed a database of tens of millions of the nation's gun owners, while publicly advocating against a government registry. Ha ha whooooooops! "That database has been built through years of acquiring gun permit registration lists from state and county offices, gathering names of new owners from the thousands of gun-safety classes taught by NRA-certified instructors and by buying lists of attendees of gun shows, subscribers to gun magazines and more... NRA spokesman Andrew Arulanandam declined to discuss the group's name-gathering methods or what it does with its vast pool of data about millions of non-member gun owners. Asked what becomes of the class rosters for safety classes when instructors turn them in, he replied: 'That's not any of your business.'"

[CN: War] Syrian opposition activists report that chemical weapons attacks delivered via rockets launched at the Damascus suburbs have killed or injured hundreds of people.

Whistleblower Pfc B. Manning has been sentenced to 35 years. Laila Lalami observes: "That's 35 years more than the people who started the Iraq War." Tim Ireland observes it's "more than 3 times the maximum sentence faced by anyone involved in Abu Ghraib torture."

[CN: Violence; incitement] Michigan Republican Representative Kerry Bentivolio says it would be "a dream come true" to see President Obama impeached. As Shaker Mod aforalpha noted here, these calls for impeachment do not exist in a void: "Someone tried to send the president a ricin-laced letter. Someone else shot a window in the residential area of the white house. There was a widely publicized foiled assassination plot. That's just what I can think of off the top of my head. I think the repeated calls for impeachment represent a refusal to accept his legitimacy as president, which is harmful rhetoric that feeds the violent rage of those who would harm the president and his family."

Republicans can't handle the healthcare truth.

[CN: Rape culture] Dr. Phil is fucking terrible. Exhibit A: Tweeting yesterday: "If a girl is drunk, is it OK to have sex with her? Reply yes or no to @drphil #teensaccused."

A fundamentalist preacher chose THE PERFECT photo for the cover of his self-published ebook.

[CN: Racism] Obviously, conservatives have some terrific theories about the Obamas' new dog.

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Bored and Strapped

[Content Note: Gun violence; death.]

Christopher Lane, a college baseball player from Australia going to school in Oklahoma, was out jogging while visiting his girlfriend's hometown when three teenage boys shot him in the back. Lane died of the gunshot(s).

Police Chief Danny Ford says Lane was randomly targeted by the teens who were "bored."

"They saw Christopher go by, and one of them said: 'There's our target,'" Ford said. "The boy who has talked to us said, 'We were bored and didn't have anything to do, so we decided to kill somebody.'"

He said they followed the 22-year-old Lane, a student from Melbourne attending college on a baseball scholarship, in a car and shot him in the back before driving off.

Ford told the television station KOCO in Oklahoma City that one of the teens said they shot Lane for "the fun of it."

The three teenagers, 15-year-old James Francis Edwards Jr., 16-year-old Chancey Allen Luna, and 17-year-old Michael Dewayne Jones, have been charged [note: video begins to play automatically at link] with first-degree murder (Edwards and Luna) and being an accessory after the fact and using a vehicle during the discharge of weapon (Jones).

My sincere condolences to Lane's family, friends, teammates, and coaches.

Everything about this case is terrible.

Last weekend, my old friend Todd was visiting, and we were talking with another old friend over drinks about all the stupid stuff we did as teenagers, because we grew up in a small midwestern town that provided absolutely nothing to do for teenagers. We didn't get into much trouble (the worst thing we ever did was put a slice of pizza in the town library's overnight return slot), but mostly that's because we found ways of amusing ourselves (making silly movies; obsessing over music) that didn't put us in the eyeline of bored cops. If we'd been more inclined to skateboard or do donuts in the K-Mart parking lot, we might have gotten ourselves into more trouble.

My point is, it's easy to get into trouble when you're a bored kid in a small town. Even when you don't have access to a gun.

I'm not saying the gun (allegedly) turned these kids into the sort of empathy-free nightmare zones who think murder is an acceptable pastime when you're bored. I'm saying that among a lot of bored teenagers in a lot of small towns, there are going to be some kids who treat that chronic boredom with troublemaking, and among them are going to be kids whose troublemaking includes violent behavior. So maybe enough with the easy access to guns.

ENOUGH.

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Also She Has Cooties

[Content Note: Misogyny; ablist language.]

This article in the Washington Post explains why President Obama and his economic team favor the loathsome Larry Summers over the competent Janet Yellen to succeed Ben Bernanke at the Fed. You see, it turns out "there are some aspects of how she operates that are different from the qualities that Obama insiders favor."

It is definitely just a coincidence that many of those "aspects of how she operates" sound a lot like misogynist dog whistles.

And, gee, if anyone is wondering why it is that the economy is totally fucked up, maybe this has something to do with it:

A second, and related, reason that Yellen's leadership style isn't a great mesh with the Obamaites is also one of her strengths. She is always meticulously prepared, a careful and systematic thinker who chooses her words carefully. In a Fed policy committee meeting or a gathering of international central bankers, she typically scripts herself in advance and reads those prepared comments.

She is methodical, not manic. And the prevailing style of the White House insiders advising on the decision leans a bit more toward manic. Geithner, for example, jumps from meeting to meeting, from hearing to phone call, without so much as a set of talking points to work from.

Who wants some boring old prepared lady when they're used to cool flyboys buzzing the tower? Or whatever.

See also: Echidne and Digby. Atrios is succinct.

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Open Thread

Hosted by a pig soap dish.

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Question of the Day

Suggested by Shaker Nice_Shirt: "What business or service doesn't exist now (to your knowledge) but totally should?"

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Blah Blah Blah

I'm very interested in what Bill Kristol has to say about Sarah Palin's political fortunes, especially because he is definitely right about everything always.

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Photo of the Day

Just a perfect picture of actresses Amy Poehler and Aubrey Plaza gazing at each other at a premiere last night. I cannot look at that picture and feel anything but happy.

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The Backdrop of My Womanhood

[Content Note: Misogyny; violence; self-harm; hostility to privacy, agency, and consent. NB: I am speaking about my personal experience as a woman in this piece. Other women's experiences may be different; some men and nonbinary people may share some of these experiences, which are not limited to womanhood.]

Today, I have read three stories about how USian women and other people with uteri can perform medical or surgical abortions on themselves, or one another, if they cannot access abortion clinics. These are stories that once upon a time I never imagined I would read in my lifetime, except as part of a historical chronicle of the dark days before Roe.

I fear becoming pregnant. I fear needing and being unable to access abortion, even if my life depends on it.

This fear is part of the backdrop of my womanhood.

Today, I read this piece by Pamela Jones about closing down her website because of digital invasions into our privacy. She excerpts Janna Malamud Smith's Private Matters: In Defense of the Personal Life, which argues that privacy is central to human dignity. And then she says: "I can't stay online personally without losing my humanness, now that I know that ensuring privacy online is impossible."

I fear the invasions of my privacy, when so much of my life is lived online. When so much of my work challenges the very encroachments upon our privacy, whether via surveillance or the denial of bodily autonomy.

This fear is part of the backdrop of my womanhood.

What creeping may be going on through the back doors of my virtual properties is, on the average day, the least of my concerns. I am primarily consumed with threats of violence being done to me, with my address and phone numbers and photos of my home being posted online, with orchestrated campaigns of trouble-making in comments, with my photo being misused by bigots or turned into a pornographic joke or threat or both. The harassment that is the cost of being a woman online, which sometimes makes me fearful.

This fear is part of the backdrop of my womanhood.

I am advised, by people who imagine that rape prevention is the responsibility of potential victims and survivors, that I must be careful what I wear, how I wear it, how I carry yourself, where I walk, when I walk there, with whom I walk, whom I trust, what I do, where I do it, with whom I do it, what I drink, how much I drink, whether I make eye contact, if I'm alone, if I'm with a stranger, if I'm in a group, if I'm in a group of strangers, if it's dark, if the area is unfamiliar, if I'm carrying something, how I carry it, what kind of shoes I'm wearing in case I have to run, what kind of purse I carry, what jewelry I wear, what time it is, what street it is, what environment it is, how many people I sleep with, what kind of people I sleep with, who my friends are, to whom I give my number, who's around when the delivery guy comes, to get an apartment or condo or house where I can see who's at the door before they can see me, to check before I open the door to the delivery guy, to own a dog or a dog-sound-making machine, to get a roommate, to take self-defense, to always be alert always pay attention always watch my back always be aware of my surroundings and never let my guard down for a moment lest I be sexually assaulted and if I am and didn't follow all the rules it's my fault, which I already know firsthand from having been raped and seeing about 1 in 6 of my female friends and about 1 in 10 of my male friends going through it and getting victim-blamed, at least once and frequently more.

I am persistently terrorized by the ever-present possibility of sexual assault that I am tasked with preventing and the knowledge, the first-hand knowledge branded into my memory like a scar that never quite heals from the sizzle of the iron that left it, that if I am harmed, there will likely be no one there to advocate for justice on my behalf, no matter how loudly I shout nor how deeply I dig my own fingernails into my skin to escape the agony of injustice and neglect for a blissful moment of self-directed pain.

I fear being hurt again, and I fear being a failure at surviving.

This fear is part of the backdrop of my womanhood.

I fear being denied medical care, being misdiagnosed, being refused by emergency crews, being told I must lose weight as a condition of care, because I am fat. I fear dying because of fat hatred.

This fear is part of the backdrop of my womanhood.

These are not my only fears. I fear hurting people, I fear letting people down, I fear war being waged in my name, I fear climate change and drought and losing someone I love and choking on a sandwich. Lots of stuff.

But these are the fears that feel permanently attached to my womanhood, because of entrenched oppressions that privileged people refuse to let go.

And I want to share them, I want to say that I am afraid sometimes, because I want the people with those privileges to know at what expense to the rest of us they maintain them, and because I want the people with my marginalizations (and others I do not share) to know that they are not alone when they feel afraid, too.

I'm not fucking stone, but you don't have to be stone to be strong.

* * *

For all my friends and compatriots, known and unknown to me, who need strength in this moment.

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Quote of the Day

"It's a good question."—Republican Senator Ted Cruz, in response to being asked why President Obama hasn't been impeached yet. Because he is a genius and a paragon of decency, like everyone else in his party.

[Note: I know all about the Ted Cruz "I'll renounce my Canadian citizenship" stuff, but let's set that aside here. Birtherism is bullshit and conservative birthers are hypocrites. Settled. The end.]

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Pot Is Legal in Washington State Now...

...so why wouldn't a Seattle cop helpfully offer directions to Hempfest to a bunch of lost stoners?

Make sure you scroll all the way down to see Seattle PD's Twitter exchange with @JMZldrm.

[H/T to Misty.]

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!!!

True facts.

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Daily Dose of Cute

Zelda lying half on my lap, as usual, snoozing contentedly while I scratch her chin. If I stop touching her for even a moment, her eyes come open and she gives me an aggrieved and desperate look, until I resume affection. Which of course I do, because how can I resist that face? And why would I want to?


Dudley lying beside his crate in a typically silly position, because he spilled the water that was inside his crate while playing with his rope toy inside the crate. Like ya do. Even though there is a whole house in which to play where you will not be knocking over water.

* * *

As always, please feel welcome and encouraged to share pix of the fuzzy, feathered, or scaled members of your family in comments.

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Two-Minute Nostalgia Sublime

Echobelly: "Today Tomorrow Sometime Never"

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In The News

Here is some stuff in the news today!

[Content Note: Racism; misogyny] Emi Koyama talks to Sarah Mirk at Bitch about silencing and male feminists.

RIP Elmore Leonard.

Congratulations to New Zealand, whose shiny new same-sex marriage law took effect yesterday!

[CN: Racism] Republican Maine Governor Paul LePage says President Obama hates white people. Which is the part getting a lot of attention, but he reportedly also waxed philosophical about "how Obama could have been the best president ever if he had highlighted his biracial heritage." Which is such a terrific (by which I mean terrible) observation! Our first black president would be THE BEST if only he reminded us constantly that he wasn't totally black! Also? I am pretty sure that the President has mentioned being biracial. I'm just saying.

US Supreme Court Associate Justice Antonin Scalia advocates mob rule. Basically. We really need to revisit that whole "lifetime appointment" thing, y'all.

Speaking of our totes awesome Supreme Court, the Obama administration is petitioning them to please rule that the Fourth Amendment allows warrantless searches of cell phones, because, according to them, "a cellphone is no different than any other object a suspect might be carrying." Ha ha WHUT. Sure. Welcome to America 2.0, everyone!

Lily Tomlin and Jane Wagner, who have been partners for 42 years, may get married, now that they can.

The Obamas have a new dog named Sunny, and she is very cute!

In case you were wondering what the perfect way to melt cheese on toast is, science has figured it out for you! OBJECTIVELY.

J.J. Abrams has released a mysterious new teaser trailer for a mysterious new project. The only thing we know for sure is that it's about a dude! (Phew!) I am, as I think is WELL DOCUMENTED, a J.J. Abrams fan, but I have to be honest that he hasn't done anything that has made me VERY EXCITED for a long time, and I'm not getting the feeling that this project will break my Wev Streak, but I hope that I'm wrong!

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Today in Reproductive Rights in the US

[Content Note: Hostility to agency.]

Tara Culp-Ressler at Think Progress: Women Are Increasingly Being Forced to Cross State Lines to Get an Abortion.

"There are just larger hurdles to tackle in order to be able to gain access," [Diane Silas, the administrator for Hagerstown Reproductive Health Services in Maryland] explained. "As long as there [are clinics], you could make the argument that there is access, but the question is, how Herculean of an effort does one have to put forth in order to gain that access?"

Over the past several years, anti-choice lawmakers have attempted to ensure that women must indeed put forth that type of Herculean effort to exercise their reproductive rights. Since 2011, states have enacted record-breaking numbers of new abortion restrictions. The state-level laws are designed to make women drive farther to get to a clinic, require women to make multiple trips to a clinic, force women to pay higher prices for abortion, and ultimately convince women that ending a pregnancy isn't in their best interest.

...Texas recently enacted harsh restrictions on abortion providers that will force 90 percent of the state's clinics to shut down; in response, the Dallas Observer published a tongue-and-cheek "travel guide" for women in the state who may need to go elsewhere to obtain reproductive care. But the outlook is bleak. "When we look at the states surrounding Texas — you know, New Mexico, Oklahoma, Arkansas, Louisiana — there are not that many providers in any of them," Elizabeth Nash, the state issues manager at the Guttmacher Institute, pointed out. Reproductive rights activists actually suspect that Texas women will cross the border into Mexico to obtain abortion-inducing drugs on the black market.

Similar situations are unfolding in other states. ...Abortion access in many red states may now be worse than it was in the 1960s, before the procedure was legalized under Roe v. Wade.

There is more, much more, at the link.

I don't know if I will ever find the words to fully express my feelings about my particular (though hardly unique) trajectory of activism around this issue: Of sending up flags for nearly a decade that Roe was being hollowed out on the state level; of being incessantly berated during the 2008 primary and election by male progressives every time I raised even the most modest concern about President Obama's commitment to defending reproductive rights; of being told, over and over, by men who only care about Roe as a bargaining chip, and not as a fundamental right of women et. al., that if I don't vote for Democrats, I am anti-choice; of pointing to anti-choicers' naked strategy of rendering Roe an empty statute; of begging for men's involvement in the reproductive rights struggle beyond hectoring female activists who question Democratic politicians' interest in Roe beyond its use as a political football; of petitioning the President to use his bully pulpit to condemn a national onslaught in state legislatures against access to abortion; of watching our rights slip away, and knowing that, even now, there are progressive men waiting to wield Roe against me like a weapon at any hint of a suggestion I might use my vote (mine) in some way other than on behalf of a Democratic Party whose national candidates promise to protect Roe while maintaining steadfast silence as it is gutted, because people who will never vote for them anyway will object if they say they word "abortion" aloud.

I am exhausted of this fight, from every direction. I am burned out like a twice-used match. I am tired of being told that this is a game by people whose privilege insulates them from the harm every lost inch yields. I am tired of fighting with people who say that women who live in red states deserve what we get. I am tired of shouting, while my President keeps quiet. I am tired of fearing what will happen to me if I become pregnant. I am so tired.

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Filner

[Content Note: Sexual harassment.]

Democratic San Diego Mayor Bob Filner has now been accused of sexual harassment and/or assault by 16 women. And yet he is still refusing to resign.

Embattled San Diego Mayor Bob Filner is expected to be back at work on Tuesday even as efforts to oust him from office seemed to intensify.

A closed-door mediation session between Filner, his representatives, city officials, a retired judge and a few others on Monday ended with no apparent resolution, but San Diego City Councilman Kevin Faulconer said the discussions are ongoing.

...Over the weekend, protesters stood outside City Hall, calling on the mayor to step down.

"There is no excuse for abuse, and there is no excuse for you to stay in power," Attorney Gloria Allred, who also attended the mediation session, told the crowd.

...Filner's office has not responded to multiple CNN requests for comment.

Last month, he acknowledged he "failed to fully respect the women who work for me and with me" and that he was "embarrassed" by his actions. But he also said he will be vindicated by "a full presentation of the facts" and that he would not step down.

Filner will be out one way or another eventually, despite his incredible belief that he's still entitled to a mayorship, that all he has to do is apologize and attend a workshop on basic decency and everything will be fine.

This case is emblematic of a dynamic I've been obliged to experience a lot lately, online and off. Men who fuck up and make spaces unsafe for women think some half-assed apology is all it takes to set things right—and, usually, that's all it does take to set things right for them, thanks to the rock-bottom expectations we have of men who harm women.

But even more critical than an apology, even a meaningful one, is taking oneself out of the space one's actions have made unsafe for women. You harm women, you lose your right to be in that space anymore. That is real accountability which centers the feelings and rights of victims of harm, rather than the centering the entitlement of an abuser.

To assert the right to stay is aggressive. It is a continuation of the abuse. It extends and entrenches the lack of safety for all women.

You harm women, you lose your right to be in that space anymore.

You don't own women, and you don't own access to spaces you have made unsafe for us. Get the fuck out.

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Open Thread

Hosted by pig corn cob holders.

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Question of the Day

Suggested by Shaker trinity91: "What if any piece of jewelry that you own is your favorite?"

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Two-Minute Nostalgia Sublime

Suede: "Sadie"

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Quote of the Day

[Content Note: Violence; racism.]

"You can't give people the authority, whether civilian or police officers, the right to just stop somebody because of the color of their skin."—Sybrina Fulton, mother of Trayvon Martin, speaking about New York City's "Stop and Frisk" policy on Meet the Press yesterday.

I love that she connected the overtly institutionally-supported "Stop and Frisk" policy to the covertly institutionally-supported vigilantism of men like George Zimmerman. I hate that she had to do it. But I love that she did it.

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Breaking Bad Open Thread

"I'll have the whoooooops with a side of oh shit."
[Spoilers are running around in their underpants herein. Content Note for references to violence.]

OMG THIS SHOW!!! It is SO INTENSE!!! WALT IS SO TERRIBLE!!! HAAAAAAAAAAAAAAANK!!! What is happening?!?!?! What is GOING TO happen?!?!?! I CANNOT CONTAIN ALL MY EMOTIONS ABOUT THIS SHOW INSIDE MY BRAINPAN!!! THEY ARE SPILLING OUT IN EXCLAMATION POINTS!!! !!! !!! !!! AHH!!!

When last we left Walt WHO IS SO TERRIBLE, he was in Hank's garage, and he had warned Hank to tread lightly, which was fucking terrifying for us all, I ASSUME, because Hank is very lovable (HA HA THE DEA AGENT IS THE LOVABLE CHARACTER ON THIS SHOW!) and Walt is the worst, and we all know, better than Hank, of what Walt is really capable.

On the one hand, it's like: GET WALT, HANK! GET HIM! On the other, it's like: Hank, please throw Walt out of your garage, then put Marie and all her purple shirts in your SUV and drive far, far away and hope that Walt's cancer kills him before he murders the fuck out of anyone else, especially you.

But of course Hank is Hank, so he throws Walt out of his garage and then calls Skylar and tells her to meet him at the greyest diner in Albuquerque. Meanwhile, Walt is trying to call Skylar at the same time, and he and Hank have a dueling mobile phone stare-down, which is AWESOME, before Walt literally burns rubber to get to the money laundrette car wash, just missing Skylar who goes to meet Hank. SHIT!!!

Meanwhile, Jesse's brain is broken, and an elderly man with a kind face follows a trail of the cash Jesse was throwing out his car window to a playground where Jesse has ditched his car and his bags full of dirty blood money and is slowly spinning himself on a merry-go-round while his sanity drips out of his ears.

And this scene, set on a playground, is yet another brilliant reminder that Jesse is still a kid. Like how he still calls Walt "Mr. White." And how he awkwardly sat at dinner complimenting the green beans when Walt made him stay for dinner and Skylar quietly seethed and drank a bottle of wine. Jesse is still a kid. He is a kid who has gotten in way over his head, and a kid who has done terrible things, not least of which is murdering Gail, and a kid who pretty much got into this whole thing because he was in desperate need of approval and acceptance and love, and he mistakenly, tragically, thought that Mr. White might be the one to give it to him.

Anyway. Walt, not being able to get a hold of Skylar, runs to Saul Goodman's office, and Saul's lackeys, Kuby and Huell, are dispatched to the storage unit to collect Walt's mountain of cash, but not before they roll around in it a little first. They deliver the cash to Walt in a rental van full of filled barrels, and they exchange THE BEST look when Walt is content with whatever amount is in there, which means they're pretty much millionaires now. Congratulations, Kuby and Huell!

Walt drives the van out to the desert and digs a ginormous hole in the ground and buries the barrels of cash. This is such back-breaking ("Breaking Back") work, I can't believe he didn't hire someone to dig the hole and then just murder that guy, because it's not like Walt gives a shit about anyone anymore.

He is still VERY SMART, though—his problem isn't stupidity; it's always hubris—so he memorizes the coordinates of his money hole from a GPS, then smashes it to bits and buys a lottery ticket with the coordinates. Please let the final scene of this show be Walt winning a massive jackpot as he falls to his knees in a hail of bullets!

Elsewhere in the desert, Lydia demands to be taken to the new meth-making facility, where her high heels sink into the sand and she complains about how dusty it is inside the meth lab buried in the ground. Todd shows up and murders everyone, because he is a murdering machine. What's going to happen with all these bozos?! I bet Jesse will tell someone about Todd killing that kid someday, and then Todd will give up Lydia. And I have about a 2% track record of correctly guessing what will happen on this show, so you can definitely take that to your storage unit and let Kuby and Huell roll around on it!

Meanwhile, at the diner, Skylar sits and listens while Hank talks to her about how Walt is terrible and how he can help her and how she needs to give a statement about how terrible Walt is so he can arrest him. And Skylar says she needs a lawyer ("Better call Saul!") and Hank is all buh? And Skylar is all, "AM I UNDER ARREST?!" and then runs out. SHIT!!!

Also during this conversation over no lunch, Hank informs Skylar that Walt's cancer is back, which she didn't know, because lying to Skylar is one of the many reasons why Walt is terrible. And when "chronically lying to your wife, including about whether you have cancer" doesn't even crack the top ten list of terrible things you do, you are SO TERRIBLE YOU ARE THE WORST.

Hank goes home and tells Marie what's up, and she goes to confront Skylar, and it is just one of the most heartbreaking and intense scenes of the show ever, which is really saying something. Marie tries to assess how long Skylar has known about Walt, and finally asks her, clearly fearing the answer, "Have you known since before Hank was shot?" Skylar's confession is a tearful attempt at an apology, which Marie rejects with a smack. I do not condone violence, but I CANNOT BLAME HER. SHIT!!!

Marie tries to leave with the baby, but Skylar resists, and Hank intervenes, telling Marie to let Skylar keep her child, even though he, LIKE ALL THE REST OF US, definitely want to get that baby the heck out of there. You don't even have to like babies to know that they don't belong around WALTER WHITE.

Back at home, Marie tells Hank he's got to tell his colleagues about Walt, and he says he needs more evidence first, because he knows his career is over the moment he tells them Heisenberg is his brother-in-law, and, in one of my favorite lines ever of the show, he tells her: "When I go in there, I'm bringing proof, not suspicion. I can be the man who caught him...at least." That pause, before the "at least." OMG. You think that sentence is going in one direction—I am getting the credit—but it's really going somewhere else entirely—I have to contribute this. Fuck. This show. SO GOOD.

Meanwhile, Walt collapses on the bathroom floor after arriving home following his mega-dig, and, when he wakes up, he tells Skylar he'll turn himself in if she keeps the hidden money a secret. "Please don't let me have done all this for nothing." But Skylar says he shouldn't turn himself in, and assures him Hank has no evidence, and suggests they just stay quiet. OMG. She is in it to win it with this guy.

In the final scene, Jesse is in an interrogation room with Albuquerque police who are questioning him about the money. Jesse just sits in silence with a thousand-yard stare. Hank shows up and asks if he can have a few minutes with Jesse. The police officers agree to take a smoke break, and the episode ends as Hank enters the room to speak with Jesse. SHIT!!!

This show. THIS SHOW!!!

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Monday Blogaround

This blogaround brought to you by owls.

Recommended Reading:

Jia, Mikki, and Flavia: A Chat with Mikki Kendall and Flavia Dzodan about #SolidarityIsForWhiteWomen [Content Note: The interview at this link includes discussion of racism, misogyny, rape culture, harassment.]

Imara: Still Marching for Jobs [Content Note: The post at this link includes discussion of racism.]

Helen: No More Gay/Trans Panic Defense? [Content Note: References to violence]

RJ: Tennessee Republican Rejects Young Girl's Request for Help with Her Father's Deportation While Crowd Cheers [Content Note: The post at this link includes discussion of racism and anti-immigrant hatred.]

Deb: Death Threats, Death Anxiety, and Dying While Fat [Content Note: The post at this link includes discussion of fat hatred, medical malfeasance, and racism.]

Rachel: How Many Abortion Complications Are Caused by Stigma, Secrecy and Silence? [Content Note: The post at this link includes discussion of hostility to agency, abortion stigma, and injury.]

TLC: San Francisco Chronicle Profiles Transgender Students in Front Page Story

GD: The Butler and the Pitfalls of Positivity [Content Note: The post at this link includes discussion of racism and violence.]

And finally! Trudy has collected a bunch of her excellent essays on street harassment in one place. She's doing some of the best writing on street harassment right now, so do check out her work when you have the time and the spoons, if you aren't already reading her regularly.

Leave your links and recommendations in comments...

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Daily Dose of Cute

Matilda, being matildaish.
As always, please feel welcome and encouraged to share pix of the fuzzy, feathered, or scaled members of your family in comments.

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On the Pros and Cons of (In)Visibility in a Life

by Shaker tarian

[Content Note: References to childhood abuse; descriptions of sex that may be NSFW, depending on your workplace.]

We were talking, once, about lovers past and present; and he said, sympathetically, "You like the broken ones, too?" It took a few days to sink in, but I finally caught the epiphany: of course I do, they're the only people with whom I have anything in common.

I was in town for a week, integrating software at a customer's facility, and took him up on the offer of a place to crash. Although we've been dating off and on for the better part of a decade, I'm never entirely confident that I'll be welcome. Not for keeping, that one; you make a space in your life, and sometimes he occupies it. And yet, with the invitation, my control slipped. Not good enough at keeping the expectations out of my mind.

I arrive a little after midnight. Something about walking into his presence always twists my soul; he's easily the most beautiful person I've ever met, male or female, and there's a radiant intensity about him that would make me self-conscious if it didn't overwhelm my senses instead. We talk for several hours while my equilibrium catches up; about the fourth or fifth rephrasing of "I'm not in a very social mood these days," I finally realize that he's directing the statement at me and not at some nebulous hypothetical crowd of people that one might find at four in the morning. All right; I'm an introvert, too, and have a lot of practice at making myself unobtrusive. And I'm supposed to leave for work in a few hours, in any event. I curl up in a corner of the room and sleep.

Two days of rubbing along the edges of someone else's life, working fourteen hours out of twenty-four, and over dinner he gets a phone call. It's his local girlfriend; they've been dating for a couple of months. They chat for a while. She's sort of new to the poly thing, apparently, and would like to meet me. Sensible enough. I ask for the usual synopsis: 26, artist, degree in theater lighting design. Met at game night "at the right time," which apparently means that she slipped through his current hermitage unexpectedly. I'm predisposed to like his otherloves; he's got eclectic but compatible tastes in women, and after all I started dating him after I'd gotten involved with his (now ex-) wife. He laughs, a little; "I think I've been getting too much sex lately." The characteristics of a new relationship, and an apology, of sorts, for the as-yet platonic nature of my visit. I don't know how to reply.

She lives up to expectations; the three of us wind up back in his room, talking (although it's mostly she and I, assembling enough common ground to support these odd triangular relationships). In the way of late-night chats, the conversation ranges, ignoring most of the usual hello-we've-just-met boundaries. A lull; she's interrupted by fingertips brushing the side of her neck. He looks over at me: "I want to give her a vigorous romping before I send her home. I'd like you to watch."

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Goodbye, Perrysburg

Commodore Perry

 Sunday, August 18, 2013.

I'm writing this from the sun porch of my parents' house in Perrysburg, Ohio.  It's getting on towards late afternoon, but the sun is still high in the August sky, the sky is clear, the leaves on all the trees are that deep green that you see when they know they only have about a month or so before the light begins to change and the air cools in the evening.  The trees have to store up as much energy as they can to get through the long, grey winter ahead.

This sun porch is a familiar spot for me.  Most of my visits to this house have been in summer, and here is where we have our breakfast over the morning papers, afternoons on the couch with Tiger baseball on the TV, and dinner in the deepening twilight that lasts in summer until long after sunset and the rhythmic chorus of cicadas, katy-dids, and other denizens of the evening compete with the traffic on the street and the trains on the C&O railroad a few blocks over.

This is not the house I grew up in; Mom and Dad moved here in 1997 after living in northern Michigan for a while, but countless evenings were spent on the back porch of another house down the street where the same sounds filtered over the voice of Ernie Harwell calling the Tigers' games on the crackling AM of WJR 760, the static telling us that somewhere, a thunderstorm was bringing rain and cool air to the cornfields that surround this small town.  Lightning bugs danced and glowed down at the bottom of the yard among the yew bushes and rhododendrons, and minty iced tea -- and later, Stroh's beer -- made the evening cooler.

Summer, as you might have guessed, was my favorite time of year here, and even with our three weeks up in Michigan on the shores of Grand Traverse Bay, nothing said summer to me more than those evenings on the porch with the orchestration of light, shadow and sound and the scent of newly-mowed grass and drying alfalfa from the grain elevator across town.

But if things go as planned, this is my last night on this sun porch in Perrysburg.  Later this fall my parents will begin a new adventure in a new place far removed from this little town that has been our hometown since 1957.  It is all good for them, and all of us -- my three siblings -- are with them every step of the way.  They are healthy, happy, and in good spirits as they forge on ahead as they have done with so many adventures in their sixty-five years together.  And as I sit here in the peaceful afternoon, watching a hummingbird busily sip from the feeder, I know that letting go and moving on is a good thing.  I should know; I've done it more times than I can count, and have the license plates to prove it.

In the many times I've moved and in the many places I've lived, I have never let go of the feeling that this town of Perrysburg will always be my home town.  I know the streets and side streets better than any other place I've lived, thanks to the bike rides with my childhood friends Joe and Randy and Deke and Trip and Cynny and Scott and Jim and Tommy and Marvin.  I still call the stores on Louisiana Avenue by the names I knew them then: Houck's Drugstore, Mills Hardware, The Sport Shop, Mrs. Piatt's Bakery, Ken's Barber Shop, and Norm's Appliance.  That's where we sat at the soda fountain and read Archie comics; that's where we bought paint and nails; that's where Dad bought his duck decoys and shotgun shells; that's where the smell of bread crossed the street and birthday cakes came the way you dreamed they did; that's where a haircut cost a dollar; and that's the place where you lined up between the Norge refrigerators and GE air conditioners to get your driver's license and license plates because Dorothy, the wife of Norm at the appliance store, was the Deputy Registrar for the Ohio DMV.  It's where I got my first driver's license in 1968, typed out on a green piece of paper from a battered Smith-Corona.  The stores have all changed their names and sell different things -- and Mills is closed, the windows papered over -- but they're still there.

The tennis courts, the swimming pool, the elementary school where I attended kindergarten, the grocery store, the railroad tracks; they're as familiar as old books on the shelf that you take down and thumb through, remembering the stories they told.  The sidewalks still have the same cracks in them, the street signs may be new but the names like Hickory, Elm, Front and Second are still where friends and family lived, and the new car in the driveway is the successor to the Country Squire and Pontiac Bonneville that once parked there, the keys in the ignition, the doors unlocked.

I made sure that as I drove around town on the way to do errands with my parents I took notice of the town.  It has changed over the last fifty-six years, but not so much that I don't recognize it by the sights, sounds, and sense of place that comes with having something become a part of you over a lifetime.  And I made sure that I said goodbye with a smile and a nod to old familiar places, echoes of laughter, memories of sadness and passings, and knowing that while Thomas Wolfe gets all the press for saying you can't go home again, you can visit, even if the place you lived in belongs to someone else and the people you know have moved on.

They're still there.  And so am I.

Our House from 1957 to 1982

 Crossposted from Bark Bark Woof Woof.

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