Oh, Pandas

As you may recall, in August, a panda at the Chimelong Safari Park in Guangzhou, China, gave birth to triplets. Now, I don't know if you know this about pandas or not, but they are maybe not the pinnacle of evolutionary success. They're basically giant adorable doofuses who can barely procreate without human intervention, and aren't much better at parenting when a mama manages to successfully give birth to one of the most absurdly delicate babies on the planet.

(That is exaggerated for comic effect. But just barely.)

So you can only imagine the chaotic ineptitude when triplets are born. Luckily, there were humans around to help! And by "help," I mean "do everything."

The triplets are now four months old, and have been recently reunited with their mother:

When NBC News visited the triplets on their two-month birthday at China's Chimelong Safari Park, their mother was only able to cope with one baby at a time and the triplets were rotated. The others were raised by keepers.

For the last two weeks their mother has been caring for two of them at a time. Experts judged that she was able to take full parental control.

"We did a lot of preparation," Dong Guixin, the safari park's general manager, told NBC News on Tuesday.

But it was a tense moment when the family was fully united.

"Everybody was holding their breath at that moment," he said. "One of the three was very nervous and stayed at the gate. Mother Juxiao waited for a moment and then went to her baby. Then she hugged the baby like humans do, we felt so moved. Personally, I think is a success."

This is the picture that accompanied the article:


"You call this a success?! HALLLLP!"
LOL. Don't worry—zie's fine! But, y'know, this is sorta why the babies couldn't hang out with their mama until they were strong enough to withstand getting carelessly trampled, basically. Oh, pandas.