Get This Guy

[Content Note: Rape culture; rape jokes; privilege.]

So, there's this British comedian named Daniel O'Reilly, who's better known by his stage persona called Dapper Laughs, who was criticized for making rape jokes during one of his sets, including saying one of his female audience members was "gagging for a rape."

(He claims he was just repeating what someone in the audience said. But whatever. You're the one with the microphone, dude. Anyway.)

O'Reilly has now (sort of) apologized for it, whilst still defending himself, but here's the part that's just priceless:

Not once was I invited to learn more about sexual violence, rape, and sexism and the problem with the attitude of men.

Instead of attacking me, why not educate me? I would happily accept it and then help and educate the millions of men who watch my stuff.

LOLOLOLOL FUCK YOU.

There is so much wrong with those three measly sentences, I hardly know where to begin. But three quick points:

1. People pushing back on rape jokes are offering "an education." The ubiquitous framing of anger about content that upholds the rape culture as "an attack" doesn't actually make it "an attack." And, even if it were, "an attack" and "education" are not mutually exclusive. Lots of negative experiences in life can also be learning moments. Often what makes something an education is how much we're willing to learn.

2. "Not once," he says, was he "invited to learn" about sexual violence or sexism. Bullshit. I call absolute bullshit on this assertion that he has never once encountered a cultural "invitation" (via public awareness campaigns, investigative articles, news programs, etc.) to learn about sexual violence or sexism, nor has he never once been asked, or "invited," to learn some shit by a woman in his life. Bullshit.

3. The very fact that he imagines he needs an invitation is indicative of male privilege as thick as shit. Women don't have the luxury of waiting for an invitation to "learn more about sexual violence, rape, and sexism and the problem with the attitude of men." No one invited him? Jesus fucking Jones, this guy. Dude, your humanity is an invitation to the party where everyone gets to learn about how women are treated like fucking garbage by lots of men. Don't blame the rest of us because you failed to RSVP.