Primarily Speaking

Presidents have to know how to make the tough decisions.
[Content Note: Incest] GOP front runner and gold toilet aficionado Donald Trump continues to be the grossest candidate in a field of gross candidates. His policies are garbage, his opinions masquerading as truth-telling are filthy bigoted dreck, and everything he says about himself suggests that he is a reprehensible specimen of humanity. To wit: His latest commentary about how he'd totally fuck his daughter, if only she weren't his daughter:

"Yeah, she's really something, and what a beauty, that one. If I weren't happily married and, ya know, her father..." he said.

It's hardly the first time Trump, the Republican Party's 2016 frontrunner, has gone a shade too far complimenting his daughter.

"If Ivanka weren't my daughter, perhaps I'd be dating her," Trump cracked in a now-infamous 2006 interview with "The View."

Three years earlier, the billionaire real estate mogul described Ivanka as "6 feet tall" with "the best body" during an appearance on Howard Stern's shock jock radio show.

Note to TPM: A father saying he wants to "date" his daughter is not a compliment.

As you've no doubt heard, Trump, employing his usual strategy against women, went after his fellow Republican candidate Carly Fiorina by attacking her appearance, saying: "Look at that face! Would anyone vote for that? Can you imagine that, the face of our next president?!"

To which Fiorina responded this week with this new ad:

Video Description: Text onscreen reads "A Message From Carly." Fiorina's voice, audio from a speech, can be heard saying over images of various women's faces, intercut with footage of her speaking: "Ladies, look at this face. And look at all of your faces. The face of leadership. The face of leadership in our party, the party of women's suffrage. The face of leadership in your communities. In your businesses. In your places of work and worship. Ladies, note to Democrat [sic] Party: We are not a special interest group; we are the majority of the nation. This is the face of a 61-year-old woman—I am proud of every year and every wrinkle!" [cheers and applause]

Obviously LOL forever at the incoherence of the injected jab at Democrats in a message clearly directed at Trump, and Fiorina and the Republican Party are still terrible jokes, but I love her reclaiming the "look at this face" in the best way.

In other news, Dr. Ben Carson is still firmly in second place and I DON'T EVEN KNOW WHAT IS HAPPENING. Neither does Jeb Bush. I bet he thought his biggest challenge was going to be Marco Rubio and not the total upending of his party into even a bigger nightmare than it was before!

On the other side of the aisle, Hillary Clinton is up to her usual NEFARIOUS MACHIAVELLIAN SHENANIGANS by "flooding the Internet" with old pictures of herself in a bid to make herself more "relatable." SCARE QUOTES ON RELATABLE ORIGINAL!!! She really IS the devil!

Senator Bernie Sanders yelled at a Fox News interviewer who ambushed him in the halls of Congress. Good for him. Every Democrat should treat Fox News interviewers with nothing but contempt.

That said, Sanders is getting (deserved, in my opinion) kudos for this exchange, but I hope he recognizes (haha he doesn't!) that it's enormous privilege that allows him to behave like that and be praised for it, in the same week that his opponent Hillary Clinton is obliged to promise to be nicer to the media.

Vice President Joe Biden is still trying to decide whether to run, and part of that calculation is whether he'll get funding, because AMERICAN DEMOCRACY, so he's meeting with bundlers. "Secretly." Haha.

Presumably, Martin O'Malley, Lincoln Chafee, and Jim Webb are still running for president.

Talk about these things! Or don't. Whatever makes you happy. Life is short.