Round Two

[Content Note: Misogyny; racism.]

So, last night was the second Republican primary debate, and I decided not to watch it, and I feel great about that decision! Here is a full transcript of the debate, if you would like to read one. And here is my Executive Summary: This field of Republican candidates is a bunch of really terrible, ignorant, aggressively cruel people.

I mean, here is something that actually happened in a presidential debate, because of the rock-bottom basement level of wretched garbage we're dealing with from these shitlords:

Moderator Jake Tapper: Ms. Fiorina, I do want to ask you about this: In an interview last week in Rolling Stone magazine, Donald Trump said the following about you. Quote, "Look at that face. Would anyone vote for that? Can you imagine that, the face of our next president?" Mr. Trump later said he was talking about your persona, not your appearance. Please feel free to respond what you think about his persona.

[Audience laughter]

Carly Fiorina: You know, it's interesting to me: Mr. Trump said that he heard Mr. Bush very clearly and what Mr. Bush said. [This refers to earlier in the debate when Trump took Jeb Bush to task for saying he "misspoke" when he said: "I'm not sure we need half a billion dollars for women's health issues."] I think women all over this country heard very clearly what Mr. Trump said.

[Audience applause]

Donald Trump: I think she's got a beautiful face, and I think she's a beautiful woman.

I mean. This is just some misogynist bullshit that does not have a place in presidential politics. But here we are.

The entire debate was littered with rank racism, which is the guiding principle of the Republican Party's positions on immigration and foreign policy. And this absurdity, at the intersection of misogyny, racism, and sheer unfettered fuckery, came toward the end of the debate:

Moderator Jake Tapper: Welcome back to CNN's Republican Presidential Debate at the Reagan Library in Simi Valley, California. We have a few last questions for you: Two of them a little lighthearted, the other one more serious. We'll start with one of the more light questions. Senator Paul, I'm going to start with you and we're just going to go down the line. Earlier this year, the Treasury Department announced that a woman will appear on the $10 bill. What woman would you like to see on the $10 bill?

Senator Rand Paul: Ooh, that's a tough one. You know, I'm big on—that we were—and I love what Carly said about women's suffrage. I think Susan B. Anthony might be a good choice.

Tapper: Governor Huckabee?

Former Arkansas Governor Mike Huckabee: That's an easy one. I'd put my wife on there. [audience laughter] I've been married to her 41 years. She's fought cancer and lived through it. She's raised three kids, five great grandkids, and she's put up with me. I mean, who else could possibly be on that money other than my wife. And that way, she could spend her own money with her face. [audience laughter]

Tapper: Senator Paul.

Senator Marco Rubio: Senator Rubio, you mean?

Tapper: I'm sorry. Senator Rubio?

Rubio: I know we all look alike. [audience laughter]

Tapper: Just the senators.

Rubio: The—Rosa Parks, an everyday American that changed the course of history.

Tapper: Senator Cruz?

Senator Ted Cruz: Well, I wouldn't change the $10 bill, I'd change the $20. I'd take Jackson off and I'd leave Alexander Hamilton right where he is as one of our Founding Fathers. [audience applause] And I very much agree with Marco that it should be Rosa Parks. She was a principled pioneer that helped change this country, helped remedy racial injustice, and that would be an honor that would be entirely appropriate.

Tapper: Dr. Carson?

Dr. Ben Carson: I'd put my mother on there. You know, she was one of 24 children, got married at age 13, had only a third grade education, had to raise two sons by herself, refused to be a victim. Wouldn't let us be victims, and has been an inspiration to many people. [audience applause]

Tapper: Mr. Trump.

Donald Trump: Well, because she's been sitting for three hours, I think my daughter, Ivanka, who's right here. [audience applause] Other than that, we'll go with Rosa Parks. I like that.

Tapper: Governor Bush.

Former Florida Governor Jeb Bush: I would go with Ronald Reagan's partner, Margaret Thatcher. Probably illegal, but what the heck? [audience applause] Since it's not going to happen. A strong leader is what we need in the White House, and she certainly was a strong leader that restored the United Kingdom into greatness.

Tapper: Governor Walker.

Wisconsin Governor Scott Walker: First of all, I got to say to Carson, Huckabee, thanks a lot for making the rest of us look like chumps up here, but, I'd pick Clara Barton. I once worked for the American Red Cross, she was a great founder of the Red Cross.

Tapper: Mrs. Fiorina.

Corporate power-failure Carly Fiorina: I wouldn't change the $10 bill, or the $20 bill. I think, honestly, it's a gesture. I don't think it helps to change our history. What I would think is that we ought to recognize that women are not a special interest group. Women are the majority of this nation. We are half the potential of this nation, and this nation will be better off when every woman has the opportunity to live the life she chooses. [audience applause]

Tapper: Governor Kasich.

Ohio Governor John Kasich: Well, it's probably not, maybe, legal, but, I would pick Mother Theresa, the lady that I had a chance to meet, a woman who lived a life so much bigger than her own. An inspiration to everyone when we think about our responsibility to love our neighbor as we love ourselves.

Tapper: Governor Christie.

New Jersey Governor Chris Christie: I think the Adams family has been shorted in the currency business. Our country wouldn't be here without John Adams, and he would not have been able to do it without Abigal Adams, so, I'd put Abigail Adams on the bill.

Insert a photoshop here of Wednesday Addams on a $10 bill.

First of all, the fact that Jake Tapper framed this question, posed to a field of eleventy-seven men and one woman, about visible female representation as a "lighthearted" question pretty much says everything one needs to know about the state of presidential politics in the US and the media's concern with equitable female participation.

Secondly, that a bunch of men who, by way of massive understatement, don't exactly show robust support for the Black Lives Matter movement would suggest putting Rosa Parks on our currency just shows what an ahistorical understanding they have of who Rosa Parks was and what she did.

Thirdly, Margaret Thatcher and Mother Theresa aren't even American women. If you are running for the president of the United States and you can't even name a single one of your own countrywomen who deserves to be recognized, FUCK YOU.

And the same goes for the assholes who chose their wife or mom or daughter, too. Talk about men who exceptionalize the women over whom they perceive themselves to have ownership. "The only women deserving enough are the women related to me!" Jesus Jones.

Finally, of course Fiorina, the only woman on the stage, punted and had to play the Exceptional Woman who doesn't even care about women's visibility on national currency. Yes, Fiorina, we sure will be "better off when every woman has the opportunity to live the life she chooses," and part of the way we get there is by visibly including women in every space and institution.

Good grief. Keep all of these people away from the Oval Office. Forever.

In summation: I hate this field of Republicans with the fiery passion of ten thousand suns. The end.